Monthly Archives: November 2008

HEADLINES FROM THE WORLD PRESS

Each week we offer a review of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our unique comments.

Headlines From The World Press

Australia, Brisbane Times: “Police Catch Criminal After 30 Years”
Slow and methodical is our slogan.

Norway, Aftenbladet: “Room Crisis At Crisis Center”
This center deals with those whose rooms have a crisis and need help.

Finland, Helsinki Times: “Baby Born On Finnair Flight”
He was named Jesus.

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “Tax Breaks For Wealthiest”
They were down to their last five million.

Australia, Sydney Morning Herald: “Lesbian Murderers Separated In Jail”
Exactly which crime could they commit after murdering–kissing?

China, China Daily: “Inadequate Sex Spurs Crime”
For whom, the one wanting or the one refusing?

UK, Guardian: “Go Home And Procreate”
It can’t be any worse than the job you do here.

Australia, The Age: “Man Stabbed For Refusing To Give Cigarettes”
He belongs to the anti-cancer society.

Netherlands, Dutch News: “Crooks Get Own Website”
Check with them for the property that was stolen from your house.

Australia, Canberra Times: “Boy Friend Attacks Lover Over Her Big Knockers”
I guess he is more of a butt than a breast man.

Finland, Sanomat: “Finland’s Newest Harbor To Open”
No ships allowed, it is a harbor.

Sweden, The Local: “Condom Ad Banned”
By whom, the male or the female?

Australia, The Age: “Conductor Dies Suddenly”
He reached the last stop.

Kuwait, Kuwait Times: “Liver Conference Held”
Want to buy one or just rent one out?

Australia, Brisbane Times: “Man Caught With Penis In Pasta”
You should have seen what he got caught in the ketchup!

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT,

Each week we offer the completely unproven remarks by a 78 year old mind commenting on the human condition.,

Nobody Asked Me But,

I see signs advertising, “Kids Eat Free,” but I never see signs advertising, “Adults Eat Free” with each meal purchased by a child.

I guess turkeys are not benefitting from the Great Recession. They are still being killed and eaten.

I believe it is midnight for the TV series, “24″ and its nonstop ridiculous violence.

I do not believe it is criminal to take ketchups when you ordered a coffee.

I have never seen a person renting a DVD from a video machine early in the morning.

I hate phone numbers presented as letters rather than numbers. They are phone, “numbers,” not phone letters.

There is always a moment of confusion and wonder arriving at your work place when there are only a few cars around. I invariably wonder if I missed a holiday.

I can never figure out why women wearing jeans have on high heels.

I believe there is a new spirit of compassion in America-that’s what recessions do to people. Many who have been with are now without.

I think many people this year will purchase Xmas presents the day after Xmas.

There is nothing more dangerous in a parking lot than a senior citizen behind the wheel and anxious to get home.

I tried getting a pill out of the wrapping. It makes one wonder if NOT taking pills is the prescription given by the doctor to the pharmacy.

People in suburban St. Louis rarely go “downtown.” To them, a trip to the “city” is going to Fenton, Missouri.

I do not understand why anyone would pay $5 for an egg sandwich. It basically consists of a 20 cent egg on a ten cents two slices of bread.

Among my first acts as dictator of America, is sending to jail, anyone calling people and beginning with, “I know you are in debt, and let me tell you……

I enjoy competition but attempting to determine which supplementary medical plan for Medicare is the best is beyond my comprehension.

I have a hunch a department store this year could clean up with an ad– everything is free, just pay checkout fees.

In olden days, workers had to ask permission to use the toilet, today they chat on cell phones while working.

The sneeze of an allergy is more powerful than that of a cold.

I can never enter a restroom if I see the man who enters right in front of me. I can handle anonymous defecation, but knowing defecation is not something I can deal with.

I prefer oatmeal raisin cookies to all others.

I have frequently thought of opening a supermarket that only catered to those plus 60. Everything would be in slow motion, the food would be cooked, and there would be shuffleboard upstairs.

I wonder if email eventually will replace mailmen.

I guess the most recession proof occupation is being an undertaker.

There are no “Muslim terrorists,” there are “terrorists.” I never read anyone described as a “Protestant criminal.”

Does India Have A Strategy For Terrorism?

The horror that engulfed India has sent a shock wave throughout the world, but it also raises questions as to the goals and effectiveness of Indian strategies in dealing with terrorism. The Mumbai disaster was created by Muslim extremists, but over the past twenty years there have been numerous examples of Hindu extremists who explode into violence, kill people, and are not crushed by the government. During the past few months Hindu nationalists terrorized Christians and drove hundreds from their homes, but no serious effort was ever made to crush those who carried out terrorism. There have been either Muslim or Hindu attacks that have resulted in hundreds of deaths and many speeches promising to do something, but after the talk, there is no action.

Perhaps, the place to begin developing a serious anti-terrorism program is to dramatically raise the size of Indian police forces and its army. Just a few weeks ago, an explosion rocked a mosque in Malegaon which was the work of Hindu nationalists and among those arrested was an officer in the Indian army.

There is need for a new deal in India which ends the ability of Hindu nationalists to impose their terror upon innocent people, and which finally resolves the lingering sore known as Kashmir. It is time to create an effective anti-terrorism group which deals with ALL forms of terror, not just Muslim.

Is Turkish AKP Losing Political Support?

The Justice and Development Party(AKP) swept into power on a platform that a centrist moderate religious centered political organization could govern Turkey in a manner that made the economy boom while protecting individual rights. There is great concern in Turkey among business and liberal leaders that the AKP is no longer representing its views. There is growing fear corruption is spreading within AKP ranks and Prime Minister Erdogan is not as popular because he has not moved quickly enough to make individual right reform become a high priority. The entire basis for being able to enter the European Union rests on instituting political reforms that foster democracy and individual rights.

The AKP moved too quickly on the headscarf issue for women in universities and would have been wiser to wait until entry into the EU. Erodgan has not reassured the Kurdish minority that its rights will be respected and he has lost considerable support among the Alevis who want true religious freedom.

Afghanistan Close To Collapse

Robert Fisk, reporting for the British newspaper, The Independent, insists the collapse of the Afghanistan government is closer than what most experts are stating. According to his observations, the city of Khandahar if virtually under the control of the Taliban and their check points are now in operation within fifteen miles of the capital of Kabul. “Hamid Karzai’s deeply corrupted government is almost as powerless as the Iraqi Cabinet in Baghdad’s ‘Green Zone” lorry drivers now carry business permits issued by the Taliban which operates its own courts in remote areas of the country.” In the frenzy to maintain control, Karzai’s government is executing prisoners at an ever increasing rate.

The promised “new Afghanistan” that George Bush proclaimed in 2001 in which women would now have equality has been transformed into a fundamentalist Islamic society run by men who force women to wear the burka and make it difficult for girls to attend school. Fisk was repeatedly told by Afghans they did not want the return of the Taliban, but they detest and distrust the current Afghan government. Corrupt politicians and businessmen skim off millions from outside aid so limited amounts actually reach the intended population.

Many innocent villagers are caught in a crossfire. If they are compelled to give the Taliban aid the next day soldiers arrive to claim they are collaborators and impose punishments. Fisk is cynical about the proposed 7,500 additional troops that Obama has pledged and says it will not provide any assistance. Is there need to divide Afghanistan to save part of it?

Immigration Down Under Is Under

New Zealand which has a fairly prosperous society is experiencing a shifting pattern of immigration and migration. Migration out of New Zealand towards Australia reached 47,800 this year compared to 34,000 last year and immigration is not matching the outward flow of people. Political leaders are trying to figure out what is going on and initially have concluded higher wages in Australia are encouraging New Zealanders to head west. In an effort to halt the flow, the new Nationalist Party is urging special bonus payments to any doctor or nurse willing to work in areas that are impoverished which would help medical students to pay off loans. They are going to offer housing breaks and to raise wages.

The New Zealand experience is simply one of many facing nations of the world as a new outburst of movement is occurring. People are seeking out new work environments in their quest for a better standard of living. No nation is immune for this process, and within ten years the United States will experience a similar occurrence.

Mumbai Attacks Threaten Pakistan-India Relations

The horror of Mumbai which continues as gun men still are fighting in the hotels they seized will not go away even after every one of the terrorists are placed in prison. The government of India is furious because it believes at least elements of the Pakistani Inter-Services Intelligence Agency(ISI) either knew about the proposed raids or actively assisted those involved in the attacks. President Zardari insists he opposes terrorism, but the more important question is does he control his own secret service whose actions in the past by organizing and funding the Taliban and helping al-Qaeda are ongoing points of anger within many countries of the world. Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh blamed “external forces” as the cause of terror in Mumbai and everyone knows he meant, Pakistan, as the “external forces.”

There is obviously need for President Zaradari to appoint an important military leader whose first task is to disband the ISI and then create a new intelligence agency which reports to the government, not to military officials. Until the ISI is brought under control there will be no trust from India or other nations of the world. The Taliban-al Qaeda links must be ended, once and for all.

Japanese Workers-Time For Sex, Not Work!

Japan is facing a demographic crisis in the coming decades which will result in a dramatic decline of its population unless the people of Japan lay off work in the office and get back to work in the bedroom. A recent survey of married couples revealed over half did not have sex over the past month. A high percent of men said they were “too tired” after working a full day to go home and have a little sex with their wives. A study bey Durex found that the average Japanese couple has sex about 45 times a year which is half the world average.

Japan has a birth rate of 1.34 which is the among the lowest in the world. If this rate persists, the Japanese population in 2050 will drop to 95 million from its current 124 million. Keidanren, Japan’s largest business organization is asking its 1,600 members to allow its married members to spend more time at home, and, hopefully, fooling around with the spouse in a burst of Japanese patriotism to keep their nation strong.

Czech Republic Dithers Over Lisbon Treaty

All member states of the European Union, but the Czech Republic, have voted on acceptance of the Lisbon Treaty with only Ireland saying, ‘no.” The Czech Republic has emerged as number one procrastinator of Europe by dithering around issues of sovereignty. President Klaus opposes the agreement claiming it infringes on “our national sovereignty and the rights of each individual.” Of course, the European Union has extended human rights by insisting all members adhere to basic human rights standards, but to Klaus who regards himself as the defender of free enterprise, any reasonable effort to control the greed of business people is an infringement on their rights to abuse society.

If the Czech Republic High Court accepts the Lisbon Treaty as consistent with the nation’s constitution, it is clear there is sufficient numbers in the legislature to pass the Lisbon Treaty over any veto by Klaus. The options facing the Czech Republic are clear, become an active member of the European Union or trying going it alone. The only alternative to the EU is Russia. Is that the choice Mr. Klaus wishes to make?

Mbeki Reveals Friendship With Mugabe IS The Issue!

Robert Mugabe has run Zimbabwe for over thirty years during which time this once prosperous nation has been transformed into failed economy and over three million forced to flee the country in order to avoid starvation. Morgan Tsvangirai of the Democratic Movement for Change(DMC) won the first election for president but Mugabe refused to recognize the election. Since then DMC workers have been beaten, tortured and killed, but the so-called “mediator,” Thabo Mbeki, believes all problems in the nation are the result of Tsvangirai refusing to cooperate with a dictator and bully. The agreement called for a coalition government in which Tsvangirai would have real power, but Mugabe refuses to hand over any power. His close friend, Mbeki, believes whatever deal old Robert does must be correct and in a recent letter to the Star of South Africa he blasted Tsvangirai.

Where are the Mbeki letters to the Star about the torture and killing of MDC leaders? Where are the letters to the Star about millions on the verge of starvation due to Mugabe policies? Mbeki has voided his role as a “mediator” because he refuses to examine issues in an impartial manner. Mbeki has been rejected by South Africans and now is rejected by any decent human being on planet Earth.