Monthly Archives: July 2010

HEADLINES FROM WORLD PRESS

Each day we offer a sample of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

Canada, Toronto Star: “Immigrants Face Language Test”
After listening to Fox News commentators, how about requiring them to take a language test?

USA, Army Times: “Five Governors Visit Iraq”
Five governors up for re-election seeking photo-ops?

South Africa, Argus: “We’re Being Held Hostage By Baboons”
Absolutely, they inhabit the US Congress.

UK,The Independent: “3 Year Sentence For Killing Mom”
Is it more or less for killing dad?

New Zealand, New Zealand Herald: ‘Host Finds Student Having Sex With Wife”
She’s a host for God’s sake, what else do you expect!

Russia, Moscow Times: “US Gay Couples Banned From Adopting Russian Children”
Serial rapists, criminals, and sex perverts allowed.

Czech Republic, Prague Post: “Cut Secret Services”
Hush, do it but keep it a secret.

Japan, Japan Times: “Students Suspended For Drinking Sake In Japan”
Drink it in China or Australia, but not here.

Indonesia, Jakarta Post: “Porn Sites Blocked Before Ramadan”
They will reopen for Yom Kippur.

UK, The Independent: “Man Robs Bank Dressed As Darth Vader”
There was nothing suspicious about a man dressed as Darth Vader?

Australia, Brisbane Times: ‘Monster Rat Found”
His name is Bernie Madoff.

Germany, Der Spiegel: “!5 Dead At Love Parade”
Are you certain this was not a hate parade?

Why I Hate Barack Obama

It is about time someone told the truth about President Barack Obma and why he should not be head of this nation. I submit to a candid worl tghe reasons why I don’t like this man.

He went to Harvard, I didn’t.

He was born in a gorilla camp in Africa.

He hangs around with guys who read books and think they are smarter than a Wal-Mart Associate.

He does not believe what appears on Fox News.

He got us into war in Afghanistan in 2001 when he was posing as George Bush.

He will not personally waterboard terrorists, and prefers it be done by flunkies.

He went on a talk show instead of giving a speech to the Boy Scouts.

He has yet to offer any proof that he did not murder John Lennon.

He has refused to have sex with Sarah Palin.

Neither of his daughters are in the military service and fighting in Afghanistan.

His wife is into obesity instead of allowing people to pig out.

He returns books to the library on the due date.

He doesn’t drink tea which means he is either for the British or the Americans.

He will not appoint Rush Limbaugh as Secretary of State and allows a lesbian to hold that office.

He will not halt the entry of those high tech guys from India who are always creating new companies.

I never see him carrying an American flag when he visits foreign leaders.

He has a tall wife, I have a short one.

He roots for the Chicago Cubs which shows how smart he really is.

He does not know the state song of Texas.

He is a Muslim and does what the Reverend Wright tells him.

Oh, and he is black. Not that I have anything against black folk, some of my best friends are black, not that I’d marry any of them.

Exclusive Photos Of Russian Spies

The United States government has released photos of the recently deported Russian spies. We are pleased to report on the content of these photos.

1. There is a photo of a Russian spy purchasing a hot dog at the corner of 43rd Street and Broadway.

2. There is a photo of a Russian female spy copying the recipe of Mrs. Morgan on making her special apple pie.

3. There is a photo of a Russian spy dressed in a cowboy suit waving the flag of Texas.

4. There is a photo of a Russian spy eating in a Chinese restaurant that is located within two blocks of City Hall.

5. There is a photo of a Russian spy reading a newspaper on a subway while eating a sandwich.

6. There is a photo of a Russian spy attending a Tea Party rally and waving an American flag.

7. There is a photo of a Russian spy pushing what appears to be a baby carriage past the Pentagon.

8. There is a photo of a Russian spy kissing a person goodbye at Dulles Airport.

We regret to inform readers the CIA has banned display of the photos because in the background of these shot are CIA agents recording what goes on.

A Car Crash In Kabul, Another Riot

Two cars crashed into one another, people were injured, and four died. It was an accident that could have occurred in Paris or London or New York or Istanbul, but it happened in Kabul, capital of Afghanistan. Within moments of the two cars piling into one another, a crowd gathered and soon it expanded in size and anger. Hundreds of people surged through the streets shouting curses at the United States and at their own president Karzai. One of the cars carried four American contractors while the other had six Afghan civilians. Police arrived at the scene to find four Afghans dead and the other two injured, but no American was dead. Police attempted to protect the Americans from the furious mob, and in the melee several Afghan security members were wounded.

A car crash initiated the violence. Ordinarily in a crowded city street a car crash might result in injuries and it is rare for several passengers to be killed–unless the other vehicle was traveling at an excessive speed. We can assume the private contractors feared being in public and drove fast. The result was death and violence. Once again, allowing private companies to perform military functions has resulted in losing confidence of the population.

Women Beware–New Nigerian Scam!

About once every two weeks I receive an email from some person in an African nation in which I am informed that this individual likes the sound of my name and is desirous of assisting me to become a millionaire. They have uncovered a secret bank account and if she can obtain from me a few thousand dollars, we can bribe Mr. X and gain control of the money. A friend of mine became trapped in this scheme and wound up giving away his entire life savings. Army Sgt. C.J. Grisham has taken upon himself the task of preventing the African con men to use information about American soldiers in order to scam money from innocent people. The new con game works this way: a profile is posted on a dating website claiming to be an American soldier seeking a relationship with a nice woman once he is shipped back home from Afghanistan or Iraq. Once contacted by a woman –or women– he asks for the loan of a few hundred dollars in order to get a plane ticket to where they live. Sometimes, the “soldier” will send a “medal”he received or something that allegedly was obtained in Afghanistan or Iraq.

Grisham posted a profile of an American female soldier and within weeks had received numerous emails from unsuspecting men who wanted to date an American female soldier who had been in the war zones. He believes a high percent of the con men and women come from Nigeria or Ghana.

The man or woman of your dreams may well be the man or woman who takes you to the financial cleaners.

Restoring Family Values, Palin Style

Sarah Palin has never missed an opportunity to blast opponents on issues of morality. Her claim to personify the true meaning of Christian family values is well known throughout the land. She is against gays and lesbians because they offer poor examples to youth regarding the meaning of family values. Of course, her own daughter, Bristol, became pregnant without benefit of marriage, had a child, and then told his dad to get the hell out of the house and have nothing to do with the kid. Naturally, this attitude is what Sarah Palin means by “family values.” After the split with ex-boy friend, Levi Johnston, Bristol reached out to the boy, and in a spirit of forgiveness and redemption, agreed to marry him. Unfortunately, it now has come to light that Levi, the boy wonder, just knocked up a girl who he was dating after told to leave by Bristol

Frankly, we don’t give a damn who is sleeping with whom, who is the father or mother of a baby, the only wish we have is for people like Sarah Palin to shut up about family values until she sorts out her own family values.

When Is A Jew Not A Jew?

The people of Israel are doing their best to compel Jews in other parts of the world to say, “good riddance” to you bigots and fools. Hillary Rubin who comes from Holocaust survivors and has a great-great-uncle who was prominent in the early Zionist movement was informed she could only prove her Jewishness by providing birth certificates from his maternal ancestors that go back four generations. She came to live and marry in Israel in order to fulfill her dream of being in a Zionist society, but the petty minded irrational rabbis who now control Israel will not allow a Jew to be a Jew unless they decide she is a Jew. “I’m the great-great niece of a prominent Zionist” and she wants to be part of Israel. Her fiance who is from South Africa and she will fly to Cyprus to have a civil marriage which are banned in Israel.

Ms.Rubin tried contacting the office of the rabbinate in order to explain why it is impossible for children of Holocaust survivors to produce needed paper work that was destroyed by the Nazis. She was informed, “we are only marrying people according to the law of Moses and Israel.” I have a hunch thousands of Jews who arrived in Israel in the aftermath of the Holocaust did not have the necessary paperwork that would satisfy the rabbinate.

P.S. My ancestors died in the Holocaust and areas where they lived had every synagogue destroyed. I guess that means I can not prove that I am a Jew according to the laws of Israel. Frankly, I have a hunch since Moses left in a hurry, they did not carry the needed papers with them across the Sinai desert

Stop, Go In Middle East Peace

Israel Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu told visiting Spanish Foreign Minister Moratinos that if he is compelled to continue a freeze on West Bank settlement past September 26 it will most likely result in the downfall of his coalition government since some of its members are adamant about ending the freeze. Moratinos told the Israel leader he had talked with President Abbas of the Palestinian Authority and he was determined not to engage in negotiations unless there is a freeze on settlements. He is under pressure from the Arab League to stand firm, and Abbas fears if he talks and settlement construction resumes, he will most probably lose support of the average Palestinian. In other words, Hamas which is feared and disliked by Israel will gain power among Palestinians if the freeze ends. End the freeze and Abbas is weakened, continue the freeze on settlements and Netanyahu is weakened. Talk about a dilemma!

There is an old song which goes, “did you ever get the feeling you wanted to go, stop, go, stop.” The song typifies issues in the Middle East. Of course, one solution would be for Netanyahu to end his coalition with right wing extremists and ask Tzipi Livni to join his government. That would ensure a government that is committed to an independent Palestine and working out a compromise on West Bank settlements.

Sharia Law Not Supported In Indonesia

A common belief among many people in western societies is that Muslims throughout the world support sharia law. Indonesia is a democratic nation ruled by a Constitution which also makes legal the presence of various religions. Undoubtedly, a minority in the country support the idea of imposing Muslim law on all people, but the important fact is they are the minority, not the majority. A recent poll reveals a steady consistent decline in favor of imposing Muslim law. It fell from 43% in favor last year to 36% now supporting the idea. Several mayors in small towns are playing the religious hate card in order to drum up support for their election. But, there is absolutely no evidence of any massive agreement with transforming a society which has diversity of religion into one in which the Muslim religion would be law for all.

Religious hysteria is common in all societies, particularly when there is strife and anxiety. Critics seeking to classify all Muslims as in favor of “terrorism” cite society such as Yemen or Somalia. Indonesia contains the largest number of Muslims in the world. It is not in favor of sharia law. The bottom line is that most Muslims are not in favor of such laws.

Sorry, Arizona, You Can’t Secede

Election year is once again upon the American people and politicians are seeking to prove they are more than just a 100% true blooded American, but one who will defend the rights of people in her state. Governor Jan Brewer of Arizona pushed through a law which allows police to halt “suspicious” looking individuals and demand proof they are a legal resident of the state and nation. Federal Judge Susan Bolton pointed out what any one in the legal profession knows, states do not have the right to pass laws dealing with foreign policy. They do not have the right to pass laws that violate federal legislation. In the 1830s, President Andrew Jackson made clear to the people of South Carolina that they would obey the law, and if they threatened to secede he would dispatch the American army and lock the whole damn group up in jail! Of course, Governor Brewer’s friends in 1860 decided they did not agree with the American people who elected Abraham Lincoln as their president and so several Southern states decided to secede and we had the Civil War.

It would be wonderful if Governor Brewer acted as a loyal American and cease playing election year politics. It would even be more welcome if Senator John McCain, who in the past has urged legalizing illegal immigrants, would display the bravery he showed while a prisoner and stand up for justice. Unfortunately, when it comes to displaying political courage, John McCain has the backbone of a chocolate eclair.