Author Archives: Fred Stopsky

Many Versions Of Donald Trump

We begin with a confession. Frankly, it is almost impossible to keep up with the continual changes in what Donald Trump thinks should be his policy toward undocumented Hispanic aliens.

Donald One: “We have these Hispanics swarming across our undefended border,the are rapists, they are murderers, they are gang members, they are ready to attack your wives, your daughters, your grandmothers. We have to build a WALL, a GREAT WALL, and when I become president,it will be built, andMexico will pay for it.”

Donald Two: “I love Hispanics, each day I get hundreds, no thousands of emails from them promising to vote for me. Now, you know that I love Hispanics,heck I hire thousands, hundreds of thousands to work for me, and I pay them at least $7.25 an hour. We have to get rid of the bad Mexicans, we have to help the nice Mexicans. I AM the greatest supporter of Hispanics in America.”

Donald Three: “I have said from the beginning, that I want to help illegal Mexican families. The Trumps love all Hispanics. I want the good Hispanics to voluntarily return to Mexico, and then come back legally. In fact, I will build plenty of doors in the Great Wall so the good Hispanics can come back. I want to be fair with the illegals. I want to help them get the hell out of here, and then get the hell back to here.”

I trust this is clear to one and all. So, if I finally understand Donald, he wants eleven million people to leave, and then he will welcome back the  eleven million.

Watching CNN Is Fun

These days I watch at least two hours each night of CNN in order to witness the verbal gymnastics of Trump supporters. I confess, after listening to their weird  defense of Donald, one loses track as to who they are or what they actually are saying. Last night two Trump supporters were defending building a Great Wall, and they are certain it will be the Greatest Wall since the Wall of China. A commentator pointed out that there are two National Parks which would have to witness a Wall being built right through them. He also noted the difficult geographic features of the area.

The response was hilarious. It was clear these two ignorant men had no knowledge there were National Parks in the region, when asked about geographic problems,they responded: “If we can get a man on the moon,we certainly can build a Great Wall to keep out Mexican drugs dealers and rapists. There is one certainty about watching Trump apologists on TV, they lack knowledge about what he just said that day. All too often, they are trapped in his comments of the day before which now have been supplanted by another Trump outburst.

The Body Part Of Texas Are Upon You

There is a famous song known to all inhabitants of Texas, it begins with the line, “The eyes of Texas are upon you.” But, these days students at the University of Texas have changed the meaning of the song. Most students  and faculty members are furious with a new Texas  law that allows any student to enter a classroom, the lunchroom, the office of a professor, the library, heck the student dorm armed to the teeth. As a former college professor, the thought that an angry student upset at his grade could enter my office armed with a gun borders on madness.

University of Texas students decided to fight back. They now carry a toy penis and shout: “Cock But Not Glocks.” They have been informed that carrying a toy penis is not permitted. As students now argue: “We have crazy laws here but this is  far too crazy, that anyone can’t bring a diko, but you can buy a gun.”

All I can say is: “Cock And Load”

Turkey Twirls

During the past four years, the nation of Turkey has played a key role in conflicts raging in the Middle East. It supported the overthrow of President Assad, and opposed the entry of Iranian or Russian troops into the conflict. Ironically, just as it opposed the strong man regime of Assad, its then Prime Minister Recep Erdogan was endeavoring to become the all powerful ruler of Turkey.

On one hand, Erdogan wanted Assad removed, on the other hand, he opposed some of the groups fighting to get rid of Assad. In fact, Erdogan did nothing to prevent thousands of ISIS followers from entering his country and making their way to Syria. Ironically, it was simply a matter of time before ISIS began to target his government. There have been several suicide bomb attacks in Turkey. So,now,Erdogan is sending troops and tanks to fight ISIS. But, he opposes other anti-Assad groups.

One needs a score card to figure out who or what President Erdogan opposes. However, it is clear that he overwhelmingly supports getting more and more power to become the dictator of Turkey!

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

We offer observations on the human condition from a 25 year old mind trapped in an 85 year old body.

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

If everybody in America is Great according to Donald, how come the US is not  A Great Nation?

Not a single Republican seeking office expresses a single word about the needs poor people.

Republicans insist the US paid “ransom” to Iran. This is the first time in history when the group seeking ransom wanted the other guys to pay them their own money in ransom.

So now, according to Republicans, Hillary is mentally unstable. Difficult to believe when a mentally unstable person charges others with being mentally unstable.

I wonder if in France one must take off the towel when in a steam bath to protect French values?

After a speech by Donald Trump I’m ready to listen with sympathy to Ryan Lochte. Ryan has such a soothing voice.

So Donald is going to get “95%” of  the black American vote. Sounds reasonable since Obama only got 93%.

There is one characteristic of Trump that is familiar to this New Yorker, he can’t utter a sentence without waving his arms.

I feel suddenly lost, no Olympic contests to watch, only men and women shouting about how we must vote.

The Speech Hillary Should Give

We offer a speech for Hillary Clinton to give about the Clinton Foundation.

“The Clinton Foundation is an institution that is dedicated to improving the lives of poor people.  It works to improve the health of children throughout the world. The goal of this Foundation is to ensure that each poor child in areas such as Africa obtain improved health, further opportunities to further their education, and a world in which they do not confront the prospect of war and rape and disaster.

Here are the facts:

Neither my husband nor I have received a single penny from this Foundation.

If the Foundation ended tomorrow, not a single penny would wind up in our  pockets.

Yes, I arranged meetings with prominent people, BUT not to gain any favors for myself. The goal of these meetings was obtaining  financial support for children. Would I meet these wealthy people again? YES, because the needs of poor and frightened children is THE only important issue that most concerns me.

Has Donald Trump with all his alleged “billions” ever spent a single dollar to aid hungry and frightened children in Africa? My thoughts are children, his ONLY thought is making MONEY for HIMSELF!”

Donald Meets Great People

Donald Trump sat down with Sean Hannity of Fox News to engage in a sophisticated dialogue concerning the American political situation. They eventually wandered onto the topic of Hispanics. As you recall, last year Donald Trump warned the American people to beware of hordes of Hispanic rapists and murderers swarming across our border and  heading straight for your home to rape your wife, your daughter, your mistress, and God knows who else.

Donald: I have a great meeting with great Hispanic leaders, and there certainly could be a softening, because we’re not looking to hurt people. We have such great people in this country. We have some great  people in this country.”

OK, We now know that we have  some Great people in this country.

OK, we now know that Donald has gobs and gobs of Hispanic friends who simply adore him.

I wonder if Donald Trump could actually express a single sentence without employing the word, GREAT!

Ooops, I forgot, we no longer have a Great Nation.

Save Morality In France!

There is a picture in daily newspapers of four French policemen standing over a Muslim woman on a beach in Nice, France. They are ordering her to TAKE OFF CLOTHES because it is against French law, it is against French values, for women to be on a beach and wearing lots of clothes. For most of my 85 years of life, the issue was that women were taking off TOO MANY CLOTHES ON A BEACH. But, apparently, I did not get the message.

These days in France, somehow, what one wears is a matter of national security. In a nation that has endured several terrorist attacks, how in the hell did they ever reach the conclusion that mistreating Muslim women will result in FEWER terrorist attacks? I thought that in a democracy, one had the right to go swimming wearing a bathing suit. The French had bought secularism to a new level of insanity!

Donald To Do List

During the next week, this is the list of things Donald Trump will do?

Crush ISIS.

End violence in Chicago.

Welcome with OPEN ARMS HISPANIC RAPISTS

WELCOME WITH OPEN ARMS HISPANIC MURDERERS

Display his love for Muslims.

Expose the Hilton Foundation Charity.

Challenge Crooked Hillary Clinton to a duel of words.

Repeat, “What Have You Got To Lose”

Welcome African Americans who love him to join his Crusade.

Make out with Ivanka.

Sheriff Donald Will Soon Arrive

I spent many  years in St. Louis which was the murder capital of the US. Now, I am in Chicago, a town which has had nearly 400 murders within a half year.  Each weekend, there are at least 60 shootings and several dead people. Well, Sheriff Donald Trump has promised that once he becomes president, this nonstop death spiral will end. He notes that he talked with a top Chicago cop, who told him the solution was to “get tough”–whatever that means.

“Violence will end within a week, that’s a promise.” As usual, when Donald Trump makes a “promise” there are words, but never anything specific as to how he will end the weekly carnage of death. Chicago police claim that not one of its top policemen ever spoke with Mr. Trump.  Naturally, his response is that he talked with a cop. So, proceeds the drama of a man who talks and talks, but never produces any specific plans as to how to transform words into deeds.