Each Christmas season I am compelled to listen to commentators discuss the end of Christmas due to Socialist ideas of liberals seeking to undo the work of our Lord Jesus Christ. Just about every night there must be a comment by Bill O’Reilly about the destruction of the Christmas spirit by those who hate Christmas. I decided to initiate an investigative act of journalism and find out what is destroying the Christmas spirit in our fair land. Here are my results:
I drove around the streets of Lombard, Illinois, a nice suburb of the city of Chicago. After visiting about sixty blocks of the area this is what I discovered:
1. Only two Santa Claus figures on the front lawn.
2. Only four houses had tiny little figures of Christ and the other folks with him.
3. Not a single example of a house with gobs of lights on it.
4. Two Menorah decorations by some Jews.
5. Not a single house had big signs with the words MERRY CHRISTMAS.
6. No snowmen on the front lawn made by kids. Of course, that might be due to the lack of snow.
Yes, Bill and the folks at Fox News, it is them damn Socialists here in Lombard that are destroying the Xmas spirit.
P.S. I did contact Santa up in the North Pole and ask him to help out. He refused to offer guarantees of appearing.