Category Archives: Dick Cheney

Words Not Spoken By Republicans

Following are words that will not emanate from the lips of Republicans seeking the presidency.

Donald Trump: About that Plan. There is none, but I can build a wall of bullshit.

Ben Carson: OK, I admit it. I don’t have the faintest idea what a president does.

Jeb Bush: OK, OK, so my brother was a damn idiot!

Carly Fiorina: I’m a fuck up artist, and I would screw anyone, and that includes the American people.

Ted Cruz: If I encountered a man holding a gun pointing at me, I would run for my life!

John Kasich: I can’t win this damn primary, but I sure enjoy the attention.

Rand Paul. How did I get stuck on this platform with these fools?

Chris Christie: I’m a big fat fuck up.

Donald’s Fantasy World

I was among the millions in New York City on the day of 9/11. I was among the millions who witnessed the horror of that day. For some strange reason, I simply do not recall the Trump version of those days. I admit to being age 85 and somewhat senile, but I simply have no recollection of his recall of events.

“I watched when the World Trade Center came tumbling down. And I watched in Jersey City, New Jersey where thousands and thousands of people were cheering. It did happen. I saw it. I saw people cheering on the other side of New Jersey where you have Arab populations.”

There is no doubt this happened in the mind of Donald Trump.

Hillary Gets Tough

It is the fall of our discontent and the time when those seeking public office make certain that voters understand they are tough dudes ready to take on any Mooslim who dares to kill anyone. Once upon a time Americans seeking to become leaders volunteered to serve in the military and actually risked their lives in combat. These days Hillary or Ted or Mike or Marco utter words of bravery behind a nice safe podium.

Hillary Clinton told the world that she intends to “press forward on both sides of the border, in the air on the ground, and diplomatically. She is ready to dispatch Special Forces and she made some vague reference to troops. Actually, her recommendations are very close to what is actually happening in Syria.

No More Starbucks!

It is November 13, a Friday the thirteenth so folks at Fox News go together and discussed what new stupidity could they unveil on this allegedly evil day.One of them went to church and then stopped by a Starbucks store where he saw the new coffee cup. Imagine a coffee cup without the picture of Jesus Christ or at least Santa or at least some reindeer! Wow! He rushed back to Fox News and had them announce to Christian viewers that there was another plot to end Christmas. How in God’s name can there be a Christmas without coffee cups with scenes of the holiday.

I have no doubt that in hundreds of Christian churches this Sunday there will be ministers urging their flock to avoid any contact with those who hate Christmas, those who hate the baby Jesus. If you gaze closely at the scene in the manger it is quite clear that baby Jesus was drinking from a bottle that had scenes of Santa Claus and snow and so on.

Did it really snow on the day he was born?

Jeb Bush At Debate

Jeb sort of said some things at the debate that sort of, not exactly totally,but sort of allowed him to come across as someone who actually had an intelligent idea. There is no question that Jeb is just as tough as brother George. He wants to establish a No Fly zone in Syria, he wants to wipe out ISIS, and boy, this is one boy who can really handle any Muslim terrorist group. After all, his brother wiped out Saddam Hussein. As far as Jeb is concerned, if only we had not pulled out of Iraq there would not be any problems. It was all the fault of the dude born in Africa who simply lacks the balls of the great George Bush.

Gee, Jeb, President Obama was carrying out the time table established by some dude named George Bush. So, tell me Jeb, would you have allowed American troops to remain in Iraq if they could be arrested for a local crime and tried in a Sharia court? I sort of have a hunch those Republican religious nuts would have gone sort of wild with anger.

Anyway, we know that Jeb is one tough dude.

A Bush In Hand

The American people have experienced three men whose last name is BUSH. The father George H.W.Bush, unlike his sons, joined the military in World War II and fought with honor and courage in combat. He alone of those with the name of Bush can look in the mirror of time and feel proud for his accomplishments. He supported civil rights,he refused to allow Israel to push the United States around, and he did urge his son, George to think twice about going to war

George H.W. to son. “You know how tough war is son, you’ve got to try everything to avoid it.” Sorry, the son did NOT know anything about war, he avoided it during the Vietnam war.
George H.W. on Rumsfeld: “An arrogant fellow. I think he served the president badly. There’s a lack of humility, a lack of seeing what the other fellow thinks. He is more of kick ass man.”

George H.W. on Dick Cheney: “Just an iron-ass.

But, in the end, dad made clear to son, “it’s not Cheney’s fault, it’s the President’s fault. The buck stops there.

Let’s Have An Auction

Someone, somewhere decided to purchase the last remaining firs class menu for the Titanic voyage and the going rate for this precious piece of knowledge was $118,750. We thought there are other items that might be auctioned off.

1. The bullet that killed the American Ambassador in Benghazi. Definitely worth at least two more years of Congressional investigations of the bullet.

2. The entire bank account of Marco Rubio which is worth at least 100,000 votes.

3. A picture of Chris Christie all naked taking a shower. Would you pay $2 for this photo?

4. The tape of a conversation between Jeb and George Bush in which they discuss the best policy to handle Islamic terrorists. How about a $1.50?

5. The tape of Donald Trump and Ted Cruz discussing handling Hispanic immigrants. A jump of 1% in the polls.

6. Dick Cheney hunting when he shoots a friend instead of the deer. This is worth a free trip for him to Iran–all expenses paid.


We offer observations on the human condition from a 25 year old mind trapped in an 85 year old body.


I expect that at any moment,Rudy Giuliani will enter the presidential election. After all, he single-handedly saved America in 2001.

I so wish to give Ben Carson a simple quiz on American history.

Not in his wildest nightmares did Donald think he would be behind Carson in a poll.

Dick Cheney is eligible to become president. I would so love to see him on the stage of clowns.

I bet Carly is on a strict diet. She looks so trim.

I wonder if Donald Trump can have his wife run for vice president with him.

Jeb Bush has become the poor man’s Bush in hand.

New Debate Rules For Republicans

Members of the Republican party who are running for the office of president are very upset. They simply do not like the manner in which moderators pose questions. They do not want any pictures of any of them sweating. They want the room temperature to be set at 67 degrees.They insist on the right to censor graphics shown during the debate. They are really upset when the camera shows no one at his or her podium. And, most of all they do not like any “gotcha questions”

In the interest of fairness, we suggest some new rules:

1. Ben Carson should only be posed questions dealing with heart surgery. After all, he lacks any knowledge of anything other than that topic.

2. Jeb Bush should be allowed to have brother George take his place using the name,Jeb.

3. Carly should only be asked questions dealing with how one goes about laying off people. Allow her to play to her strength.

4. Donald should be allowed to discuss his ventures into the world of real estate.

5. Ted Cruz should be allowed to discuss his childhood in Canada.

6. I think Marco Rubio should be allowed to discuss why Cuban refugees were worthy immigrants unlike those from Mexico.

7. John Kasich should only be posed questions dealing with his life in Ohio.

And, at the beginning and end of the debate they all should be allowed to sing: “Onward Christian Soldiers.”


We offer observations on the human condition from a 25 year old mind trapped in an 85 year old body.


I wonder if there are Republican debates in Heaven?

Then again, I know for sure there are Republican debates in Hell.

Ben Carson is living proof the town idiot can also become president of the United States.

I wonder if Jeb will endorse Marco for President?

Donald Trump has reached a lull moment in his quest for the presidency.

If shrillness was a virtue, Carly would lead all Republicans.

I do miss Rick Santorum and his sweaters.