Category Archives: Emerging Issues in the World

Information garnered from periodicals, both in America and from every corner of the globe.

Ready To Go To New Planet?

Astronomers have discovered a  second planet out there in the stars which just might be habitable for we Earth creatures. It lies in what astronomers term, the “Goldilocks zone” which refers to planets that are not too hot or cold  for human habitation. According to those who examined the planet, “it’s going to be real muggy” or much akin to  spending time in a sauna.

The real question is not whether we humans  can live on another planet, but should we be allowed to go to another planet with our ideas of hate and violence!

Camping Has Yet To ASCEND

A few weeks ago, Harold Camping, a preacher of the truth, informed the world the world was no more since Jesus Christ had returned to take home with him a few million of those with good souls and the rest of us could burn in Hell. I did gaze on the day of Ascension but failed to see the five million humans who were ascending to Heaven because they were the good guys. Funny, I could have sworn that among those heading north there was someone who looked a lot like Saddam Hussein, but I was probably confused and angry at failure to include me in the trip to the cabin in the sky. Anyway, Camping had a stroke and is now recovering in a hospital–one on planet Earth, not one in Heaven.

Flash! Camping has clarified failure on May 21 for the good guys to head skywards. It turns out calculations were a bit off, the date was NOT May 21, but October 21. I guess he should not have used the Christian calendar but stuck to a Jewish one. I am uncertain whether this means, Christians are stuck on planet Earth and the rest of us who are Jews can head up–I think Jesus said go up or maybe–did he say, “down?” I get confused because I was in Rapture.

INSIDE THE MIND OF SARAH PALIN

Please join us in a voyage through the mind of Sarah Palin.

1. I bet liberals would love making what I get for a speech.

2. Jews in America speak English, how come they don’t in Israel?

3. I bet getting pregnant would raise poll numbers and what I get paid for a speech.

4. I can TOO see Russia from my window

5. It is simple math, less money for the government means we can speed up reducing the national debt. Mrs. Klinkerfuss taught me that 1 plus 1 equals 3.

6. I bet Michelle Obama’s daughters can’t dance as well as Bristol

7. That bitch, Mrs. Robinson gave me a C in Communication, now let’s see how those smarty teachers get paid back from yours truly.

8. I need a new slogan: Hmm How about, “A gun in hand is a dead rapist.” The NRA would love it!

9. People are tired of that Kenya stuff. Maybe I should say he was born in Mexico, and is an illegal immigrant.

10. One day I will have to get around to reading that Constitution.

11. Gee, if I was president, I can travel for free.

12. Gee, if president, I get free clothes

13. How can I ever repay that old fart, McCain, for what he did fore me? At least I don’t have to listen anymore to those boring speeches about being in prison.

14. Some day I will have to find out where that Vietnam place is.

15. Some day I will have to figure out what GNP really means.

16. Gee, it would be great being president. Don’t pay attention to me and goodbye to you.

17. Let’s face it, I AM beautiful!

18. At least I am still married to the same old boring fart. More than most Republicans can say.

19. I know the Federal Reserve System is Socialism. But, frankly, I don’t have a clue what it actually does.

20. I’ll match my head of hair against Donald Trump, any day!

On Elizabeth Taylor

Elizabeth Taylor died yesterday. To those under the age of sixty, her death is of no importance since by the time they arrived in the world, she was at the beginning of her fame in the movies. But, to those of us who were teenagers or those in their twenties and a male with dreams of romance and even the terrible word, sex, she was the ultimate beauty. She was the “girl next door” with whom you shared a glance, the girl whose smile and radiance made your day a slightly better one. She existed in the minds of young men every night as they sighed in dreams of a date that would never occur.

Elizabeth Taylor had many marriages and each one appeared more complicated and confusing than the previous adventure into matrimony. But, who cared, she was ELIZABETH TAYLOR, and her beauty gave permission to do whatever her heart desired. How could any male become upset because she married this guy or that guy, we all wanted to be the next man in her life.

Alas, she is no more. Tonight, I shall dream of this beautiful woman of my youth, as she was, not as she is today. Dreams die hard, even at the age of 80.

Let’s Speak Arabic And End Deadlock!

The nation which is known as “Belgium” is divided into a Dutch speaking Flanders and a French speaking Wallonia. Historically, those from Wallonia were the most economically advanced portion of Belgium, but in the 1960s, the Dutch speaking area economically zoomed ahead and now enjoys a much higher standard of living. In June, 2010, a Flemish nationalist party, N-VA, led by Bart de Wever, gained the most seats in Parliament and Bart decided the time had come for the nation of ‘Belgium” to “evaporate.” Since that month, there has not been a meeting of Parliament and there is no new government. The Belgians just go on and on without a government for 270 days.

It is a poker game in which no one will blink. The people of Belgium have tried demonstrations, they have tried public strip tease activities but members of Parliament refuse to budge from doing anything to resolve the crisis.

In one respect, this situation exemplifies the modern world. Humans are part of global societies while many humans feel a sense of local identity. Are Belgians part of the European Union or are they members of Flanders or Wallonia? A modern dilemma.

Importers And Exporters Of Weapons

Guess which nation has assumed the role of top importer of weapons in the world? The answer is India which has overtaken China as the country which imports the most weapons in the world. Rahul Bedi, an analyst, notes: “india has ambitions to become first a continental and then a regional power. To become a big boy you need to project your power.” India now accounts for 9% of all arms imports with China in second place at 6%. India is spending billions of dollars on fighter jets and aircraft carriers in order to be able to demonstrate its power anywhere in the world. Of course, part of the reason for these expenditures it to make clear to its ongoing enemy, Pakistan, that attempting any military action will result in confronting one of the world’s military powers. The major supplier of India is Russia which has for years been a source of its military equipment.

Naturally, the United States of America continues playing a role in export and import but in this case, we export more weapons than any other nation in the world. At least a trillion dollars is devoted to posturing power while the money could be used to raise standards of living and work to end world poverty.

We suggest that all nations of the world declare war on the Pacific Ocean and dump weapons into its waters. It might add to pollution, but it would save lives.

Is California The Future?

Mexico is in virtual chaos due to drug wars raging between rival gangs and the past weekend massacre of fifteen young people at a party is undoubtedly linked to one drug lord or another. California is the first state in this nation which has the courage to confront the stupidity of our drug laws that have transformed ordinary honest citizens into criminals. Prohibition did the same for a decade and the result was lawlessness and corruption of police forces and government. Proposition 19 will be a California referendum issue this November. If adopted, it will be legal in California for those 21 years or older to grow or possess marijuana and it would allow local government to license and tax retail outlets which are selling marijuana. An estimated $2 billion will be collected by the government.

The United States did NOT have any drug laws until 1914 when the initial ones were passed in order to criminalize Chinese immigrants who smoked opium. In reality, marijuana in this country is available to anyone. Reality is that middle class people who use drugs rarely wind up in court, and the 750,000 currently in jails for drug offenses are either from poor white or black and Hispanic backgrounds.

Let common sense rule. Allow California to take the first step in ending Mexican drug lords. Legalize drugs and end our madness.

Should Humans Leave Earth?

Noted scientist Stephen Hawking believes it is time for his fellow humans to get the hell off this planet since they have just about used up anything of worth on Earth. In his view, the human race is composed of ‘angry, gluttonous and expanding humans” who intend to ruin anything of worth on the planet. “It will be difficult enough to avoid disaster on planet Earth in the next hundred years, let alone the next thousand or million. The human race should not have all its eggs in the basket on one planet.” Mr. Hawking does make a point. However, little does he know that other life forms in the universe have created a barrier in space which prevents we humans from being able to contaminate the rest of the universe. Who would want a life form which has never ceased hating and killing during its entire existence?

Be honest, would other life forms really want creatures who believe the Tea Party contains an intelligent idea to spread its stupidity throughout the universe? Full disclosure. I was brought by my parents from the planet of Xul and left here to learn how life forms are brutal and dangerous. They will be coming by shortly to take me home to peace, love, and joy on Xul. Sorry, Humans, you are stuck here!

END OF NOVELS?

During the first quarter century of my life, reading novels was an important component of my intellectual growth. I devoured novels from not only America, but France, Germany, England, Russia, Italy, Japan and a host of other areas. Novels offered me insights into the human condition and enabled my mind to think and feel emotions from various cultures and times. There were giants in the land–Camus, Sartre, Hemingway, Wolfe, Mailer, Silone, and dozens of others who explored the human psyche and entered into the total breadth of the human experience. Lee Siegel, writing in The New York Observer, argues “for about a million reasons, fiction has now become a museum-place genre and for better or worse, the greatest storytellers of our time are non-fiction writers.”

I regret to agree with Mr. Siegel. We have come a long way in writing from great Russian writers when we now hold up Stephen King as a master storyteller. Sorry, Harry Potter is a wonderful series for youth, but when compared to Albert Camus…..

Are Aliens Harmful To Humans?

Noted British scientist Stephen Hawking warned the world that seeking contact with alien life forms could be dangerous to our health. He compared arrival of aliens on Earth to Columbus wandering into the Western Hemisphere and spreading death and destruction. “If aliens visit us, the outcome would be much as when Columbus landed in America, which didn’t turn our well for Native Americans.” He believes advanced life form “would perhaps become nomads, looking to conquer and colonize whatever planets they can reach.” He did add, “the real challenge is to work out what aliens might actually be like.”

As a visitor from the planet of Xul, I take umbrage at the remarks of this noted human scientist. Together with my fellow Xulians we are simply here to observe the madness of human life forms and already have informed the Planetary Council that no human should be allowed to pass into outer space. Who would want these savage, war crazed life forms on their planet. Sorry, Mr. Hawking, it is YOU HUMANS who are the monsters, not we alien life forms.