Category Archives: Gender Issues

Bernie Has Dreams

Bernie won another one and he is all hot to trot down to South Carolina where many await hearing his dream to end income inequality and make poverty disappear from the world.  We can expect for the coming months Bernie to discuss his dreams of how America can once become a land that allows each and every person to get a good solid middle class life.

Actually, it is rather easy to accomplish this goal. Examine how Bernie will do it:

!. Bernie will propose and Congress will unanimously vote to raise the top tax rate to 70% of money over $1,000,000.

2. Bernie will propose and Congress will vote to pass a bill canceling all student debts. Pretty easy, just propose and Congress passes.

3.  Bernie will propose and Congress will pass a law that ends college tuition for all Americans–and any immigrants as well.

4. Bernie will propose and Congress will pass a law that ends stock manipulation and sends directly to jail any businessman who is below the law on any issue.

5. Bernie will propose and Congress will pass a bill ensuring the end of coal use in manufacturing. And, Congress will agree to any international agreements dealing with climate control.

Actually, it is very easy, just  present the bill and Republicans vote for it. Check past history if you doubt me!

Inside Rubio Headquarters

This intrepid reporter was able to sneak into the headquarters of the Rubio camp  in order to report how Marco and his boys and girls will pursue the fight to become president.

Marco: Well, guys,  I guess using the same speech is not going to cut it this year. I was so hoping to be able to repeat and repeat the same words. I guess this means I have to learn an entire new speech. And, I have to learn this within a week or so. So, let’s get down to the nitty gritty of what I have to say.

Mary: Well,  Marco, how about saying something for the women of America?

M: But, Mary, I do. How many times have I spoken about mom and how she made the trip from Cuba. I love mom, I love my wife, I love my daughter, God, I do love women. What else should I be saying?

Joan: Marco, I think what Mary was getting at was addressing issues that women  face each day of their lives.

M: Oh, I get what you mean.How about this: Women of America, I am the only candidate who believes that each and every woman should have her own dishwasher and dryer in her own home. I am the only one who wants women to give birth to the baby conceived when she was raped. See, how much I care about women!

Mary: Marc, I just don’t think that will play well among young women. How about student loans, that might interest some young women?

Marco: Well, maybe I could tell them to find a wealthy businessman who will pay off their debts and all they have to do in return is sort of do things to please the guy?

Joan: Maybe, Marco, we should get back to the story how your mom escaped from Cuba and the washing machines.

Carly Fiorina Is Mad!

Another primary battle is over, another time that Carly Fiorina has been slighted by the Republican establishment. There are two ways to evaluate her performance, you can read results from the top down or from the bottom up.If you utilize the second method, which Carly regards as the only honest one, then our hero came in second. And, guess who came in last–Donald Trump! I checked with the only woman in the race for president as a Republican.

Carly: “fred, this is simply another plot by the Obama administration to get rid of the only woman who can defeat Democrats, ISIS, al-Qaeda, and terrorism in the world. Do you think it is a coincidence that I did not get the most votes in New Hampshire? The answer is simple– I am the one Islamic terrorists most fear. I am willing to go to Syria, look the damn terrorists right in their faces and make clear that  President Fiorina will drop atomic bombs and blast them all to their heaven where the virgin women await them!!”

Conversation With Ben Carson Alter Ego

I decided to engage in a conversation with the Alter Ego of Ben Carson.

M: So, what’s it like being the Alter Ego of Ben Carson?

AE: Fred, how the hell can I be an alter ego of a guy who just ain’t got much ego in the first place?

M: So, you have some problems?

AE: Problems! For God’s sake the other night he wouldn’t even go out on the stage but hung back watching everyone else walk right past him! This is not only quiet man, but a man in search of who the hell he is.

M: I sort of feel sorry for little Bennie Carson.

AE: Sorry for  him? How about showing some sorrow for me! Damn it,  He just mumbles and stumbles through life and all we hear is about  God and how he is a great surgeon. Hell man, this guy doesn’t even know where the hell Mexico is!

M: So, what’s the future of the real Ben Carson?

AE: For me, I would so love to go back to cutting up bodies. At least when he is cutting bodies the man has some ego!

Conversation With Chris Christie

We decided to discuss the Chris Christie campaign with the candidate himself.

M: So, Governor, what really is your view about Marco Rubio?

C: We in the great state of New Jersey know a punk when we see one. That twerp could not last a single day if he was in a New Jersey town with some tough guys hanging around the corner. He has the backbone of a chocolate eclair!

M: Those are tough words from one tough guy. What’s your take on this Cruz guy?

C: A Bible thumping bag of bull shit if you ask me. Every other statement from this punk is about asking God for His blessing. I guess the next thing he will claim is to be the Pope. Oh, I forgot, he switched from being a Catholic to being  God fearing two gun son of a bitch from Texas!

M: I must ask, what is your take on the Donald man?

C: Just one day, just one day, I would like to see him pull that bull shit when in a room with the Mafia crowd.  Just one look from a Mafia Don and Donald would run from the room while pissing in his pants and never turn back. He is full of hot air and he  thinks bullying Jeb Bush is what he could do with a real Mafia soldier. Just try it, Donald, just try it. We will pick up your body in the nearest river that night!

M: I’m curious, what is your take on Bernie Sanders?

C: Oh, you mean the Jew fella. A nice Jewish man who should spend his time in the park playing chess with the other white haired old guys. Frankly, I have no idea what he really wants, and I doubt that he does.

Conversation With Rubio’s Alter Ego

There is considerable evidence if the debates reveal anything about the candidates that Marco Rubio has a set list of thoughts and words to express. We thought it might be beneficial to discuss him with his alter ego-the other Marco, you know, the reverse Rubio.

M: So, tell me Alter Marco, how would you describe your political thoughts on what must be done in this nation?

AE:  This election is about the Hillary Clinton emails, it is about the great tragedy  in Benghazi, it is about how Hillary Clinton is simply a female version of Barack Obama and they seek to destroy the very fabric of our society.

M:  That sounds very similar to what the real Marco Rubio says at each debate. Are you telling me that his alter ego has the same script?

AE: This election if about Hillary Clinton emails, it is about the tragedy of Benghazi,  it is about the buddy of Barack Obama, and it is about their plan to destroy the very basis of our society.

M: Gee, what you just said is what you just said a few moments ago.

AE: If you check both statements you will find different words used. How can it be a  script if I change some words?

M: So, I gather that you really don’t like any Democrat?

AE: This election is about Hillary emails and the debacle at Benghazi when she allowed over three Americans to die.  Emails and Benghazi are what is most troubling Americans and Marco Rubio will not allow liberals to silence his voice of reason!

Conversation With Heidi Cruz

We decided to discuss the candidacy with the wife of Ted Cruz. After all, if anyone knows the real Ted Cruz it must be Heidi Cruz. She has been with him for several years while the media really only has had major contact with the two gun tough talking sheriff form Texas.

Me: So, tell me Mrs. Cruz, not a single US Senator has given support to your husband, could you explain why?

Heidi: Ted is a family man. He loves me, he loves the children, he loves his family,  he loves his supporters, he loves those who run oil companies, Ted is simply a loving man who also talks honestly.”

M: Well, he sort of pulled one on Ben Carson the night of the Iowa primary,what happened?

H: It was all the fault of CNN for sending incorrect information. My husband believes in the strict interpretation of the Constitution. He also believes in a stick interpretation of what CNN reports. Blame it on that liberal organization which has been telling lies to ruin my husband’s career.

M: But, why the failure to get a single Republican US Senator to support him in this election?

H: Jealousy is the answer. Ted is brighter than the whole pack of these idiots. They are jealous of him, they are jealous of me. How many of them is married to a gorgeous intelligent woman who earns a high salary!

M: I’m curious, is your husband ever wrong?

H: Of course not. He has the blessing of God Almighty, if he is wrong, then you are saying Jesus is wrong!

M: Please make certain that your husband does not get angry at me, I certainly don’t want the Lord throwing thunder bolts in my direction.

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

We offer observations on the human condition from a 25 year old mind trapped in an 85 year old body.

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

Each day in America some political leader shouts, his message is the shout.

Ben Carson always looks so forlorn on the stage as he is ignored by all.

John Kasich offers some interesting thoughts, but he continues to shout them.

I gather Carly Fiorina is upset at being left off the stage. Now, why would she be left off?

Jeb is throwing a few punches. The question is have they hit somebody?

I so miss the ironic comments of Rand Paul.

Has anyone thought of contacting Mitt Romney?

Donald Is The Man

Tomorrow America will know if Donald Trump is still the Man. He has defied “experts” for over six months who repeatedly insisted that his campaign of shouting and demanding and insisting would soon be met with fatigue on the part of Americans, but here it is February 8, 2016 and the Donald man is still Number One in the hearts of Republicans. Why?

1. His opponents are either recycled politicians such as Mike Huckabee or the stumbling and bumbling Jeb Bush.

2. Americans are angry and filled with confusion so  many seek the voice of someone who, at least, claims to know what is wrong and how it can be fixed.

3. Donald is a master in claiming to know how to fix anything. OH, he has a GREAT PLAN. And, the gullible and frightened American public buys into this bombast.

4. So, he definitely is THE MAN.

5. Ironically his main opponent at this moment is a white haired man who claims to know how to fix all problems–Bernie Sanders.

We live in the age of shouting and screaming. Definitely, the way to solve our problems. Then again, has ANY politician really identified the “problems” and how to solve them??

Voter’s Guide To A Republican Debate

The Debate season is still going on even though the winds of March are just around the corner. In order to assist readers, we are offering a short guide to any Republican debate. Why worry what is coming next when we can guarantee exactly what candidates will say.

1. We love Hispanics but want them to remain in Mexico.

2. We hate the wealthy but we can not raise their taxes since that would lead to a depression.

3. We will abolish Obamacare and guarantee those without health care complete health care without any government involvement. Tune in sometime in late November about the specific details.

4. We will end student debt. Each and every student who has loans is guaranteed they will repay those loans with the help of rich folks. Each student will contract with a wealthy person who will repay their loan in exchange for 10% of their salary from now on.

5. The days of ISIS are over after we carpet bomb them into oblivion!

6. We love women, in fact we all have moms and sisters and wives to prove it.

7. Send Hillary Clinton to prison and restore America’s honor.

8. Oh, we love Israel and we love Jews. Some of our best friends are Jews.