This intrepid reporter was able to sneak into the headquarters of the Rubio camp in order to report how Marco and his boys and girls will pursue the fight to become president.
Marco: Well, guys, I guess using the same speech is not going to cut it this year. I was so hoping to be able to repeat and repeat the same words. I guess this means I have to learn an entire new speech. And, I have to learn this within a week or so. So, let’s get down to the nitty gritty of what I have to say.
Mary: Well, Marco, how about saying something for the women of America?
M: But, Mary, I do. How many times have I spoken about mom and how she made the trip from Cuba. I love mom, I love my wife, I love my daughter, God, I do love women. What else should I be saying?
Joan: Marco, I think what Mary was getting at was addressing issues that women face each day of their lives.
M: Oh, I get what you mean.How about this: Women of America, I am the only candidate who believes that each and every woman should have her own dishwasher and dryer in her own home. I am the only one who wants women to give birth to the baby conceived when she was raped. See, how much I care about women!
Mary: Marc, I just don’t think that will play well among young women. How about student loans, that might interest some young women?
Marco: Well, maybe I could tell them to find a wealthy businessman who will pay off their debts and all they have to do in return is sort of do things to please the guy?
Joan: Maybe, Marco, we should get back to the story how your mom escaped from Cuba and the washing machines.