Category Archives: Islam

Republican Candidates Galore

It is one year before the election of our next president which means the list of those seeking this position contains more and more names each passing day. At current, we have:

1. Jeb Bush who is a secret Hispanic, a devout Catholic and he has no connection to anyone carrying the last name of Bush. He is really related to Busch beer.

2. Chris Christy can never attend a meeting on time because he gets stuck in traffic jams on bridges.

3. Rich Perry is still working to memorize how many Cabinet members there are and what are the names of those Cabinets.

4. Rich Santorum is busy buying new sweaters so he can come across as just another Joe.

5. Rand Paul wants everyone to know that what he advocated yesterday has no relationship to what he stands for today.

6. Marco Rubio is young at heart and therefore this entitles him to become our next president.

7. Donald Trump is currently very busy in Africa tracing down the birth certificate of you know who.

8. Lindsay Graham is seeking to persuade anyone outside the state of South Carolina that he is running for president.

Oh, for the days of Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann. I so miss these two female clowns!

An Election Was Held

Every few years the people of Sudan are allowed to hold an election. It is a three day event in which people are encouraged to go to a building, enter a booth, and cast a ballot. I assume they at least get some refreshments or perhaps a drink. The President of Sudan, Omar al-Bashir gets elected. This year the vote was only 94.5% of those who cast a ballot. Let me explain the difference between an election in the Sudan and one held in the United States of America.

1. About 46% of the people of Sudan voted, in America we get at least 47% who vote.

2. In the Sudan, those with guns make certain people vote the right way. In the USA, we make certain those with gobs of money make certain who wins.

3. In the Sudan, they use weapons to make certain people vote the right way. In the US we use television like Fox News to get information to voters explaining how and who to vote for.

4. In the Sudan imams get out the vote. In America, Christian preachers and rabbis get out the vote.

In the end, someone gets elected, but life goes on much as it did before the election.

HEADLINES FROM WORLD PRESS

We offer samples of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

Sweden, Local: “US Student Sues Swedish University”

Damn it, he got his degree and was not in debt!

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “Police Post Speed Meter”

It only applies to cars driven by black folk.

Norway, Norway Post: “Five Arrested For Wolf Hunting”

I will woof on this story.

Greece, Kathimeri: “Denial”

The national song of the American Congress.

Kenya, Nation: “Garbage Collection Begins After Two Week Suspension”

How does anyone know?

Chairman Barack At Gathering

Every year each American president is provided one opportunity to express his sense of humor before the annual gathering of White House correspondents. President Obama displayed an interesting sense of humor

“Just this week, Michele Bachmann predicted that I would bring about the biblical end of days. Now, that is some legacy!”

Donald Trump is still here–still”

Turns out that Jeb Bush identified himself as an Hispanic back in 2009. You know that is an innocent mistake. It reminds me of when I identified myself as an American.

“Ted Cruz said that denying the existence climate change made him like Galileo. That’s not really an apt comparison. Galileo believe the Earth revolved around the sun. Ted Cruz believes the sun revolves around Ted Cruz.”

Let me add a few:

“Sarah Palin looked out the window and saw God gazing into her house wondering if this was really the result of a million years of evolution of humans.”

“Rand Paul stood up for ending military involvement in the Middle East before he came out for it.””

“Sheldon Adelson threw his money into the ring.”

“Bibi Netanyahu insists that he is the right choice to play Moses, after all he brought Israelis out of the land of peace into the land of war”

Vatican Safe, For Now!

There is some evidence that terrorists were planning an attack upon the Vatican. Initial reports indicate that Islamic groups connected to al-Qaeda were ready to send in the suicide bombers against the Vatican in order to shut up the Pope who constantly makes statements about the need for peace in the Middle East. However, our research indicates that not only are Muslim terrorists angry at Pope Francis, but so are a heck of a lot of Catholics who regard his comments about gays and lesbians as insulting to all they hold dear in the Catholic religion. After all, would you want your daughter sitting in church next to some LESBIANS! One suspects there are some priests who do not like all this talk and action about predators upon the young. They believe it is their right to seek out young boys for sex mates. Just read the Bible.

Pope Francis has brought some fresh air into the Catholic Church. OK, Islamic terrorists are angry at him, then again, they hate imams who speak for peace. But, if Pope Francis lives long enough there will be hundreds of priests who would welcome his death. The Vatican curia do not want anyone examining their financial transactions. I have a hunch, threats upon the life of Pope Francis are more threatening from within the Curia than from without!

Republicans For Christianity

A common theme among those seeking the Republican nomination for president is their commitment to the Christian religion. They insist that President Barack Obama is a secret Muslim or that he not only hates America but he hates Christianity. Republicans wrap themselves in the mantle of Christianity and proclaim that if elected they will defend Christians throughout the world. Let us examine the Republican party record in defending and protecting Christians in the Middle East.

1. When Republican President George Bush invaded the country of Iraq there were 800,000 Christians who could trace their ancestry back nearly 1800 years ago. Saddam Hussein was always protective of Christians because they wound up owing him for that protection and would not oppose him in power.

2. Along came the Americans. Now, there are about 250,000 Christians in Iraq. The rest have fled for their lives.

3. Why did they flee? George Bush installed people like Prime Minister Maliki who hated Christians and allowed Muslim fanatics to murder, harass and drive them from the country.

4. There are Christians in Syria and they are already gone or shortly will depart.

The Bush policies have been the greatest disaster for Christians in history.

So, Rand and Ted and Jeb sing out your love of Christianity. One more Republican president and there will not be a single Christian left in the Middle East!

Oops, Putin Said A Bad Word!

Vladimir Putin has an ability to irritate one and all in this world. He is so confident that whatever he utters will be accepted in the Soviet Union, –oops, I meant, Russia, that he once again angered another government. He was attending a meeting in the nation of Armenia to remember the murder of 1.5 million Armenians residing in Turkey during World War I, when he referred to this disaster as a GENOCIDE. Naturally, the government of Turkey is upset because they prefer living in a world that never happened. Either the Armenians in Turkey killed themselves or they were collaborating with the invading Russian army, but somehow in some way about 1.5 million wound up dead. Actually, the American Ambassador Henry Morgenthau described the atrocities frankly and clearly to his government. Armenians were murdered and it is time for Turkey to recognize this sloughier and initiate an educational program that teaches the truth.

What happened a hundred years is not the fault of modern Turks anymore than the Holocaust is the fault of modern Germans or the massacre of Indians in the West is the fault of modern Americans. As a society we must accept the truth of what happened in the past and work to ensure it does not happen today.

Fallacy Of Drone Wars

The ongoing complaint about President Obama by members of the Republican party is that he is some sort of Neville Chamberlain who wants to appease evil doers. They insist he fails as a war leader because he does not want to take out the bad people. Drone attacks under the administration of President Obama are fifty times more prevalent than under the administration of our prior president, one George Bush. The real criticism of Obama is that he has gone crazy in ordering Drone attacks that have resulted in the death of thousands of bad guys –along with the deaths of thousands of innocent people. The US government has now acknowledged that a drone attack on January 15, 2015 which was directed at a military compound also led to the deaths of two hostages–Warren Weinstein and Giovanni Lo Porto. The Pakistan Foreign Ministry issued a statement: “The deaths of Weinstein and Lo Porto in a drone demonstrates the risk and unintended consequences of using this use of technology that Pakistan had been highlighting for a long time.”

Where is the evidence that killing bad guys with drones–along with a lot of innocent people–has in any way or any form resulted in the weakening of terrorist forces??? Drone attacks may result in the death of a bad guy but it also results in making other men desire to obtain revenge. The US government is now proud they have been open about admitting these deaths. Terrorism will only be defeated by another ideology that results in people leaving terrorism.

Oh Dem Mosques!

There is a constant fascination within Europe, among those who hate Muslims for the presence of mosques in their towns. There is something about the towers that are found upon mosques that irritates those who oppose the Muslim religion. Cathedrals are OK, they are examples of beautiful architecture, but once a mosque is built–the entire appearance of a town is completely destroyed. And, even worse, those Muslims issues calls to prayer. Talk about the horror of the Muslim religion–it actually gets people to enter a hose of prayer! Wow! At present only about 30% of Christians in Europe go into a house of prayer except for Easter or Christmas. It is simply not fair because them Muslims pack in people just about every day in the week.

Geert Wilders and Machiel de Graat are really angry about mosques. They want every mosque in the nation of Holland to be closed–yesterday! “We want to clean the Netherlands of Islam.” In their view the presence of members of the Muslim religion threatens the identity and culture of the nation of Holland. Gee, I wonder why some Dutch people go to pray and why most Dutch people do NOT wish to enter a house of workshop? Now, that is a mystery of life–and death for some religions!

Explaining Turkey

There should be another category in awarding Nobel prizes for peace that is focused on deterring if the nation of Turkey is for or against peace in the Middle East. President Recep Erdogan has been opposed from day one of the government of President Assad in Syria. He opposes this man because Assad is really not a very devout Muslim and he is close to the government of Iran. Of course, the government of Turkey engages in trade and good relations with Iran, but Erdogan does not want them having anything to do with the government of Syria. The Kurds who reside in parts of Turkey and Syria were fighting against ISIS which is another group that Erdogan does not like, but when the Kurds asked for some help, President Erdogan refused. In other words when a group that opposes the group he does not like, he refuses to help them.

The story goes on and on. At no point has Turkey engaged in military action against Syria. As Erdogan notes, ” I do not believe air strikes are sufficient to defeat Daesh(ISIS) in either Syria or Iraq. A rand offensive is needed align with air strikes so that operations can be successful.” Ok, he wants an offensive operation, but for some reason he does not wish Turkish troops to be involved, just the other guys. Of course if the other guys ask for his aid the answer is-NO. At this point Turkey has the best armed force of any Arab nation. But, he wants the other guys to fight.