Category Archives: Satire

HEADLINES FROM WORLD PRESS

We offer samples of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “Ban Lifted On Delays”

Of course, no packages will be sent, so no delays.

Japan, Japan Times: “Shut Down Minstrel Show”

You mean, close Congress down?

France, Connexion: “Man Married Bride’s Twin”

One out of two is not a bad average.

UK, Guardian: “Stuck In Train Toilet”

A heck of a lot better than being stuck in Texas with Ted Cruz!

Russia, Moscow Times: “First President Transplant”

I assume they were placing a heart in Putin.

Bibi Never Gives UP

It is understandable that Bibi Netanyahu is upset because the good old days when American forces fought and died in Iraq is no longer possible. Bibi is a fighter who never gives up regardless of the fact the guy he is fighting wants to end violence and work for peace. Of course, Bibi and his buddies in Congress are convinced that Iranians can not be trusted and the only land in the Middle East which can is ISRAEL. So, examine the record:

Israel launched an attack in 1956 against Egypt until told to stand down by President Eisenhower–a Republican.

Israel launched an attack in 1967 and won the Six Day War.

Israel invaded Lebanon in the 1980s

Israel has four times invaded the Gaza Strip.

And, violent Iran: IT HAS NEVER INVADED A MIDDLE EASTERN NATION.

Anyway, Yuval Steinitz, Israel minister strategic affairs said that military action is possible against Iran. “It was on the table. It is still on the table. It’s going to remain on the table.”More words of peace from Israel.

HEADLINES FROM WORLD PRESS

We offer samples of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

Japan, Japan Times: “Kids Weak On Drawing Conclusions”

Have you checked the adults in Congress?

Canada, Toronto Star: “Prison For Silicone Buttock Injections”

I shit on this story!

Norway, Norway Post: “Used Car Dealers Break Promises”

For God sake, they are used car dealers, what else?

France, Connexion: “Good Samaritan Injured”

Hopefully, not by a good samaritan.

Australia, Canberra Times: “Push For Same Sex Laws”

This did not occur in the state of Indiana!

StandFor Religious Freedom

The ongoing mantra of the Republican party and its mouthpiece, Fox News is that our Founding Fathers believed this or that. Justice Scalia continues to insist our Founding Fathers had clear ideas about freedom for the individual and they definitely did not want the government to regulate business, of course, there were no such business establishments in those days. But, it is very clear that our beloved FoundingFathers had clear ideas concerning separation of church and state. The First Amendment stated that religion had no place in our government. They would have been aghast at laws that have been passed such as the Religious Freedom Restoration Act. Our Founding Fathers were Deists who did not believe ANY organized religion should be able to control ANY aspect of government.

Indiana, along with other states, has passed this ridiculous unconstitutional law. According to Tim Cook, CEO of Apple, it is akin to a ‘whites only” sign in the good old days when whites could keep black skinned folk out of their neighborhoods. Governor Spence now insists the law was passed because it was concerned about rights of gays. Huh? It is time to return to the ideas of our Founding Fathers. Keep government out of the religious aspects of our lives, George Washington disliked any form of religion in our government. I assume it he was alive today, Fox News would declare that he hated our Constitution!

Life Before Obamacare

It is now two years since that hated event when President Obama imposed the worst example of tyranny this nation has endured. He imposed a law that requires people to be healthy. In the annals of tyranny this must be the most vile and hateful law that has ever been passed since it takes away the right of the American people to be ill. So, what has happened to this nation since we now must become healthy?

1. Nearly ten million people who lacked health insurance now have it.

2. The cost of health care has declined.

3. People with pre-existing conditions now have low cost access to health insurance.

4. Doctors are not rebelling.

5. Senator Ted Cruz who denounced this evil has now asked to become a member of Obamacare!!

And, the sky has not fallen!

Let’s Repeal ObamaCare

There are a few million Americans who do not have health care and oppose any and all attempts to give them healthcare. Of course, there are a few million who received healthcare under the infamous Affordable
Care Act, and are furious that the GOVERNMENT wants to protect their right to get ill and die. Just another example of BIG GOVERNMENT running amuck and taking away our right to decide what happens to our life and that of our children. First Big Government helps your child to receive medical care, and the next step, no doubt, is taking over control of the education of your children. If it clear that Barack Obama, since he was born in Africa has no understanding of our Constitution.

The Constitution clearly states each citizen has the right to bear arms and if I can cuddle a gun than it only stands to reason that I alone decide how to care for my child’s health. I do not need any DOCTOR who works for BIG GOVERNMENT to force his pills and tests upon my beloved child. Keep your hospitals, keep your drugs, keep your operations, but as long as I can pray, then my children will never get sick!!

HEADLINES FROM WORLD PRESS

We offer samples of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

Sweden, Local: “Dog Moves In With Family”

I assume the cat moved out.

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “People Lose Faith In Police”

Sorry, this is NOT news.

France, Connexion: “Thousands March Against Health Laws”

At least they are getting some exercise.

China, China Daily: “China Heads Reform Project”

We can expect that many minds will be reformed of bad ideas about democracy.

Russia,Moscow Times: “First President Transplant”

Finally, Putin gets a heart!

Nazis Still An Issue In Greece

World War II ended over seventy years ago, but to the people of Greece the legacy of that nightmare continue to linger in their minds. Greece is a nation that is in serious economic trouble and has been forced to obey the dictates of the European Union as to how money should be spent and how taxes should be imposed upon the population. Greeks are now bringing up memories of World War II when their nation was occupied by German troops and its population had to fork over millions of dollars to their enemies. Greek banks during the war were compelled to give the German government millions in “loans” that obviously were never meant to be repaid. Today, a different German government is imposing demands for money from Greece and again insisting it has the right to decide how money is spent in Greece.

Greek Prime Minister Alexis Tsipras is now posing some interesting questions. How about Germany repaying his nation for the loans they gave back in the 1940s? Does the current Federal Republic of Germany have to assume responsibility for what the Nazi Germany of Adolf Hitler did seventy years ago? Or, should the world forget that a Nazi government robbed people of their money. Do modern Germans owe those who were robbed by a different German government? Or, should we simply forget and forgive?

US Options In Iran??

Every so often an American leader will utter words that completely confuse this writer. CIA Director was talking with a Fox News correspondent when he said: “There are a number of things that the United States has available to it to prevent Iran from getting a bomb.” He did not clarify what he meant so we thought it would be beneficial to spell out those possible weapons we possess.

1. We can send Bill O’Reilly to Iran to write “The Killing Of The Ayatollah”

2. We can make sure that all Fox News broadcasts are heard in Iran.

3. We can send Ted Cruz on a suicide mission to destroy Iranian nuclear facilities. Remember, he is the Senator from TEXAS!

4. We can refuse to talk with any and all Iranians.

5. We can get Bibi Netanyahu to pilot an Israel suicide bomber to blow up something in Iran.

6. We can get Sheldon Adelson to spend money on a newspaper in Iran that hates the government.

7. Of course, we can always send in the Marines.

If I was the leader of Iran, I would be scared to hell!

Republicans Insult The Flag

Members of the Republican party of the United States of America so enjoy posing as stalwart defenders of the nation and continue to be upset that this country is ruled by the tyrant from the land of Africa. I have always admired Senator John McCain for his defense of basic values to the nation and our flag. His buddy,Lindsay Graham, has always insisted that he places the good of country before the good of his party. But it increasingly is evident that this group of politicians who claim to be Republicans place their ideas as to what constitutes patriotism as the most important value in life. OK, Senator Graham has the right to disagree with the President on the issue of Iran and nuclear arms. So, here is the latest example that Republicans prefer behaving as children than mature adults.

Senator Graham has made clear that he will push through legislation that ends American participation in the United Nations unless President Obama adopts his views on how to negotiate with Iran over nuclear weapons. He believes making a treaty with Iran is a “mistake for the ages”k and just like Bibi Netanyahu he intends to wreck the house because daddy Obama will not allow him to play with his toys. The Children’s Hour is now the most important time of the day in our Congress!