Category Archives: Satire

Wisdom of Chairman Vladimir

These days the man from the KGB is feeling his oats as separatist forces in Ukraine gain more territory in the battle to decide who will be in control of this land. Vladimir has provided the thugs who term themselves as rulers of Ukraine, and things do not look so bright for the nation of Ukraine. So, let us examine the record of Chairman Vladimir as it pertains to his own nation, Mother Russia:

1. Wages are down 8 percent.

2. Retail sales are down 4.4%

3. The ruble has lost forty percent of its value.

4. Capital investment is down 6.3%.

5. The Gross Domestic Product is down 3%.

6. Poland’s largest retailer has decided to hold off on investment in Russia.

Yes, Chairman Vladimir, you are making Russia a great nation.

HEADLINES FROM WORLD PRESS

We offer samples of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

New Zealand, New Zealand Herald: “Don’t Buy Unless Free”

If it is free, how can I buy something?

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “Noses That Backfire”

ACHOO!

Norway, Norway Post: “Preschool Teacher Caught Drunk”

She just wanted kids to lap up some knowledge.

China, China Daily: “Should Naked Tourists Be Blacklisted”

Nope, why cover their nudity with blackness?

UK, Guardian: “Another Draw”

The state of government in America.

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

We offer observations on the human condition from a 24 year old mind trapped in an 84 year old body.

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

In coffee shop, I am the man with a pen, but not machine.

Few know what they know.

Shout for joy today, but what about tomorrow?

Some move hands to make a point.

We always depart from today to greet tomorrow.

Few religious figures are famous in modern America.

Nurses are unsung heroes of our lives.

All too many worship at altar of hate.

Illness makes one fatigued.

To be alone with your mind is to be in the company of wisdom.

Saudi Government Concerned About Death

There is a feeling of comfort for we Americans knowing that the great nation of Saudi Arabia stands with us as allies in the fight to end terrorism in the world. The Saudi Press Agency is furious at the terrible murder of three Muslims in North Carolina. The Saudi government called for an end to incitement of violence against Muslims in the United States of America. Saudis are angry at the “racism and Islmamaphobia that is so prevalent in the United States of America. If there is one thing the Saudi government can not tolerate is “cowardly terrorist behavior” against the innocent. I must confess at feeling comforted that one of our allies does not like cowardly acts of terrorism.

Of course, I am a bit confused. During the past year at least two dozen people in the peaceful land of Saudi Arabia have been beheaded. Prominent critics who seek democratic rights for women or the people of Saudi Arabia wind up getting a few hundred lashes on their backs. I assume lashing people is simply an example of NOT behaving in a cowardly manner. Oh well, I am so happy we have the “good guys” on our side in the war against terrorism.

NOBODY ASKED Me BUT

We offer observations on the human condition from a 24 year old mind trapped in an 84 year old body.

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

Children should be encouraged to run fast.

The beginning of the end does not have an end.

Tomorrow will always be yesterday.

I am surprised seeing a person eat soup with left hand.

Obama lives in a bubble filled with Chicago voices.

A general seeks men to lead as a general.

These days shrill voices dominate America.

Some wear dark glasses indoor, why?

Some simultaneously gaze at laptop and iPad.

The military mind is only understood by those who have served in the military.

HEADLINES FROM WORLD PRESS

We offer samples of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

Russia, Moscow Times: “Moscow Welcomes Kim Jong un”

To a basketball game?

France, Connnexion: “Chicken Rules The Roost”

In Congress, Republicans play chicken with our economy.

USA, aol: “Dirty Money Confiscated”

Not in Wall Street!

Norway, Norway Post: “Criminals Deported”

And, not a single one is a wealthy person.

Sweden, Local: “Widen Duties For Dogs”

So, now dogs must guard cats?

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

We offer observations on the human condition from a 24 year old mind trapped in an 84 year old body.

NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

I wonder if one can gaze too far?

Ministers and rabbis work hard to come across as knowing something about the world.

In modern America there is no last word.

we usually gaze at the person who sits next to us in a coffee shop.

Always remember there is a tomorrow, if not, you are dead.

Mah Jong is a game I know exists, that is all I know about it.

I so miss running against the wind.

Some enjoy the gift of ignorance.

Silence should be the norm during political campaigns.

Six gathered around a table with six laptops. Modern lunch time

Bibi Is One Butt Head

Israel Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu spent part of his childhood in the United States where his father was a staunch Republican so it is no mystery that Bibi welcomes Republicans and seeks their support. He accepted an invitation from John Boehner to address Congress. Normally, yes normally, a leader of a country does not address another nation’s legislative body without permission of the chief executive. Heck,Bibi is Bibi and he doesn’t give a shit about this guy named President Obama. The President told the media, that he has “real differences” with Bibi. “I don’t want to be coy. The Prime Minister and I have very real differences around Iran and sanctions.” He went on to say, “much as I love Angela Merkel(German chancellor), if she were two weeks away from an election,she probably would not have received an invitation to the White House,and I suspect she would not have asked for one.”

It is time to play hard ball with Bibi because the people of Israel must not suffer for his inept leadership. How about:

1. Make clear to Bibi if he wants to behavior like Bibi, the US will just abstain the next time the Security Council votes to send Israel to the International Court of Criminal Justice.

I have a hunch Bibi will begin to act with maturity!

Greece Wants Dough From All

The government tot Greece is very upset at the German government. As you recall, during World War II, German troops occupied Greece and sort of wrecked things and killed people. According to newly elected PrimeM Minister Alexis Tsipras, Germany has a “moral responsibility to pay reparations to our people, to history,to all Europeans who fought and gave their blood against Nazis.” Fair enough:

1. The Greeks under Alexander the Great sort of killed a few people, burned a few towns and thus the people of Iran(formerly Persia) could use a few bucks in return.

2. As you recall, Alexander sort of went through Palestine and Egypt. As a Jew, I am owed a free vacation in Greece in return. Remember that moral obligation.

Obama Speaks Freely

As the leader of a nation, President Barack Obama has to be mindful about what he says in public. He just returned from a trip to India where his goal was to persuade the government of that nation to cooperate with the United States in creating a coalition of Asian nations that can restrict the drive south of China. The government of China desires to establish itself as the power in southeast Asia in order to dominate potential oil fields in the South China Sea. So, what does President Obama express in public: After expressing the idea that India is a beautiful country, he went on to say that “acts of intolerance (in India) that could have shocked Mohandas Mahatma Gandhi” have been common in that nation. He was referring to attacks upon Muslims in India.

Yes, there are attacks upon Muslims in India, yes, there is religious intolerance, but leaders of India are attempting to control such outbursts. India has numerous religions including Christians and Muslims, but it will take time for our concepts of religious freedom to become part of the laws of India. Have some patience.