Category Archives: Russia

Putin On Evil Doers

There is one wonderful aspect to being dictator of Russia, when you make claims there are no voices in parliament, nor in any media outlets still around that might contradict what you say. During the past year, there have been several stories about how Russian athletes were given dopes that enabled them to win many victories.Putin is furious at these claims, calling them “discrimination”and assuring Russians that we are “not going to put up with it.”

In fairness to our beloved leader, our noble father, let me explain what he is describing. There is overwhelming evidence that black American athletes were born in Africa, not America. Since there are few major highways in Africa, these men–and women–ran for miles each day in order to get from point A to point B. That is why they are so fast.

There is proof that American athletes have been drinking specially made “coffee”at Starbucks. Actually, this “coffee” is really a special mix of marijuana and other drugs which enhance the muscle strength of athletes.

Since America had slavery  this gives America a special advantage in athletics. It has been proven that black slaves are more muscle bound than white folks. Since they are more primitive, these blacks have greater speed that is needed to escape tigers and panthers.

On To Russian Border

American troops are being sent to Latvia where they will conduct training exercises that are designed to show President Putin that NATO and the US mean business. These exercises are taking place in eastern Europe on  the border of Russia. Imagine:

1. Russian troops and missiles sent to Cuba. What would be the reaction of the US government? Oh, we know it. President Kennedy in 1962 demanded their removal.

2. Russian troops sent to Laos or Cambodia or any place in the Far East. America would demand their removal and argue about how Russia threatens peace in the world.

3. China is rebuilding rock formations in the  South China sea, and America demands their removal since they threaten world peace.

All US and NATO forces should leave any border positions next to Russia. These forces are provocative factors and do not ensure the safety of any east European nation.

Russia NO Gay Spot For Gays

Islam Abdullbeckov and Felix Glyukman are two gay men who live in Russia. They heard about the shootings in Orlando and decided to do something symbolic in order to express their sorrow. They went to the US Embassy in Moscow and placed a candle and left a sign that said: LOVE WINS. Of course, in most ordinary nations in the world, this simple expression of love would be welcomed. But, these two gay men live in Putin Russia.

They were arrested and taken to jail on grounds they were holding an unauthorized demonstration. As Islam commented: “we only wanted to  put a poster and light a candle.” Ah, but this is Putinland and only the Boss can light candles or place posters.

Russian Government Endorses Putin Quotes

The Russian government has released a Putin Book of Quotes. Here is the Impudent Observer collection of Putin quotes.

Trump could never Trump Putin in the insulting game.

Wrestle a bear to train how to wrestle an opponent.

Donald has the Mexicans, I have the Chechens, how about a swap?

OK, I admit, Donald has out fucked women in the fucking women contest.

There is nothing gay in being gay.

Hit them in the balls is better than hitting them in the pocketbook.

Fear is the most important thing a ruler can instill in people.

Mother Russia must put the Americans to sleep forever.

Russia can beat any Ukraine any day in the week.

God blessed me with power and now I use that power to bless God.

Life In Russia

We offer a brief synopsis of life in Russia as it is portrayed in headlines from the Moscow Times:

“State Has 6% of Russians Under Surveillance”

“Police Officers Raid Russian Newspapers Suspected of Extremism”

“Police Cordon Off Village of Chechen Man Who Complained To Putin”

“Russian Zoo Names Black-Haired Goat–Obama”

“Chechen Leader Kadyov Lost His Cat”

We decided to add our own:

“CIA Steals Eurovision Contest From Russia”

“Putin Wrestles Bear Into Submission”

Putin Is Angry At EU

These are not the best of times, these are not the worst of times for Vladimir Putin and the semi-dictatorship that he runs in Russia. Last week a former trainer who worked with the Russian winter Olympic team revealed the entire team was doped up which led to their wining many Gold medals. Naturally, Vladimir was furious at this attempt to smear the noble, pure tradition of Mother Russia. There is no  question these charges stem from the EU and the American CIA.

So, yesterday, the Eurovision Song Contest added new evidence of an EU plot to overthrow the government of Russia. Jamal, of Crimean heritage who is from Ukraine, won the  song contest. Her song was entitled: “1994.” She is of Crimean heritage and the song recounts how  in 1944 during WWII, thousands of Crimeans were rounded up and shipped to Siberia by the Stalin dictatorship. The  Russian government denounced this “insult” to Mother Russia!

So, What About Syria?

Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders have made income inequality the main issue in their contest to become the candidate for president, but one more terrorist attack and  many Americans will be more interested in physical security than financial security. Neither candidate has offered any sort of foreign policy program that deals with this key issue. There is a large segment of the American population that is scared stiff. So, what can Bernie or Hillary offer that might address this issue?

1. It is time to be realistic. It is time to call for a new anti-terror alliance that involves the US, Europe, Russia and Iran.

2. During World War II the US and England formed an alliance with the Soviet Union. Yes, the Soviet Union was led by a dictator who would make Vladimir Putin come across as a choir boy. But, VICTORY was the name of the game.

3. Iran has boots on the ground in Syria–the Revolutionary Guards and Hezbollah, so let the US offer Special Operations and air might.

4. It is time to make clear to Turkey the Kurds are part of the anti-terrorist equation.

Yes, terrorism can be defeated in Syria. So, Bernie and Hillary, offer a damn plan!

How The World Views Donald Trump?

Secretary of State John Kerry is concerned at the image of America being conveyed by the Trump quest for publicity–getting to become president.

France: Would you consider heading the National Front which seeks to send Muslims back to where they came from? Of course, we doubt that many French women would consider you to be a seducer with words of love and tenderness.

Germany: Herr, Donald, we regret that you were not around when the guy who shouted even louder than you knew how to handle inferior creatures of life. What a wonderful head of the SS you would have made!

Russia: Vladimir Putin wants to meet you man-to-man in a wrestling contest. Winner takes all- Putin wins, he is the candidate for president. If Ted born in Canada can run, why not a guy from Russia!

ISIS Land. Donald, we have to admit when it comes to bullshitting, you are the number one leader in the world. We will trade you one carpet bombing for a bomb anywhere in Texas.

China. Mr. Trump we are willing to offer you as many exports to China as you desire–tariff free. Of course, the goods will  have to be made in Vietnam, you know, the place where John McCain lived in the Hotel Hanoi while real patriots were fighting the Viet Cong.

Cuba: Donald, we are not Mexican peasants seeking to head for the USA. We offer you an entire country in which Spanish speaking people would welcome your Great,Great, Business ideas and keep them at home.

Putin Restores Law And Order

It is quite clear there are many bad people here in America and over in Russia who simply do not understand that President Vladimir Putin is really attempting to create a Russian society in which every single man and woman has the absolute right to praise their beloved leader without  any fear of being harassed or sent to jail. Putin understands Russians society is not being threatened so much by Islamic terrorists as by LIBERALS who seek to use words in order to end freedom and democracy in the homeland.

As Putin so clearly notes: “Even when Internal Security employees use repressive  measures against those who break the law, people see that it is done in society’s interests and will have the support of the people.” First, you allow criminals to shout,”freedom,” and soon you will discover that liberals and those seeking civil rights are really out to overthrow the nation’s interests and bring chaos and disorder to peaceful Mother Russia.

I would so enjoy listening to Putin and Trump discuss human rights.

So, What About Syria?

It has become increasing clear that neither General Trump nor General Cruz have much to offer about  the situation in Syria. I know they want to carpet bomb some place but just about every place in Syria has been bombed and bombed. At this moment, believe it or not, there is a strange quiet in this forlorn area of the world. The guns are sort of silent, trucks with food are creeping into isolated cities, and just about every group has reached the point of exhaustion. Al Nusra,the al-Qaeda group is furious at ISIS which stole its prominence, and the Free Syrian Army just is tired of the year after year attempt to overthrow President Assad.

The Russians are leaving, but the Iranian Revolutionary Guards remain to support President Assad. I do realize Republicans want to shoot someone, but there is simply no group around willing or ready to shoot anyone. The reality is that President Assad will be with us for the near future. About the only effective fighters against Assad remain the P.K.K. Kurds and they are hated by the Turks.

Anyway, all is quiet on the eastern front–at least for a day.