Category Archives: Russia

Putin King Of Human Rights Abuses

Vladimir Putin is a very brave man, he goes off into the wilds of Russia, bare chested and ready to confront any animal who would dare to cross his path. He has been trained by the KGB to tie up opponents, beat and torture them, and inform the media that the person assaulted an unarmed interrogator and thus had to die-it was all self defense. Sergei Magnitsky was a Russian lawyer who uncovered a huge swindle by Russian officials that resulted in the theft of over $200 million. What else could an honest swindler do but beat the hell out of this man and send him to his death.

Vladimir Putin has high moral standards. If there is one thing he will not accept is for anyone to point the finger at a member of HIS government. After the US Congress passed a bill to restrict movement of those who killed Magnitsky what else could Putin do but sign  into law a bill that bans adoption of Russian children by American parents? There are over 700,000 children who are orphans and only 18,000 Russians who seek to adopt one.

Russian children will suffer due to the actions of Putin, but, he is the KING so one must accept his decisions. Oh, I forgot, Putin and his buddies charge that American parents want a child so they can cut him up and sell his body parts. Why else would someone seek a Russian child?

Strange Russian Corruption

There is a land that is far, far away in some distant place on this planet where the laws of nonsense govern its people. Alexi Navalny once was a member of the Union of Rights Forces, but the party was dissolved and transformed into a protest movement. However, the government of Russia is now charging him with fraud and embezzlement of funds from the non-existent party that he used for his own purposes. Somehow, he obtained money from this party in order to provide, “services” but there is no documentation from the non-existent party that he provided those services.

Let me see, there is a non-existent party, the so called, “victim” of this so-called “embezzlement” has never filed a complaint, and there is a criminal who is charged with a non-existent crime. Only in Putinland could there be such “crimes.” God Bless Vladimir Putin for enabling people on this planet to go to  jail for embezzlement-no complaint, no evidence, no crime….

It’s Offical-Tomorrow Will Arrive

I am feeling greatly relieved at word from Moscow that President Vladimir Putin has assured the people, not only of Russia, but the world that the world will not disappear in the coming days. One can forget about prophecies by Mayans or anyone else, because the MAN has made clear that HE will not allow this world to collapse. Giving his first, and thank God, not his last press conference, President Vladimir Putin is confident the world will continue for at least 4.5 billion more years. If you doubt his prediction, the president will give you a wonderful financial compensation package.

“I know when the end of the world will come. It will be in 4.5 billion years approximately–that will be the end of the world.” I am deeply worried because the man who knows all could only guarantee an “approximate” time, not a certain time! I will attempt my best to sleep in the coming years.

Russia Is Not Green!!

The Putin  government(sometimes referred to as the Russian one) made clear to one and all the color green is forbidden in their red land.  As Nicolai Komosomolskaya told the media, “in today’s Russia there are no preconditions for possible ‘color’ revolutions and we are certain that we will not allow the realization of such scenarios in our country.” For many years the color Red was the only one allowed in this fair land. Today, the only color allowed is, white. This color symbolizes surrender by the Russian people of their freedom to a man raised under the Red banner of communism.

It is very easy to avoid a green color in your land. Lock up anyone who dares to display a green shirt or have them take a long ride in a car from which there is no return. Of course, white Siberia is bound to encourage folk to throw away any green clothes. They do not blend in with snow.

US Magnifies Putin Misrule

Vladimir Putin is upset at the American government for daring to question his benevolent work with the people of Russia. The US Congress passed, and President Obama signed, a new law which bars Russian human rights violators from entering the USA, and freezes any bank accounts they might possess in American banks. The law was named after Sergei Magnitsky, a Russian fighter against corruption who was  beaten to death in a Russian jail in 2009. Vladimir is not accustomed to anyone daring to question his human rights program. He  stands for the right of any Russian to agree with his policies and guarantees they will not  encounter beatings–at least in Russian jails.

Putin termed the law, ” a purely political and unfriendly act” and is confused why Americans want to “sacrifice US-Russian relations in  order to get some political dividends at home.” He does have a point. Why would anyone get Vladimir upset, oh well, I guess if they are not in Russia it is OK.

Russia Rushing Away From Syria?

Russian president Vladimir Putin is an arrogant man who seeks to control all situations, but for someone who spent formative years in the KGB, there is always an element of reality to his life. There are increasing signs that Russia grasps the end is in sight for Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. Mikhail Bogdanov, Deputy Foreign Minister sounded the first bugle sounds of recall from Syria. “An opposition victory can ‘t be excluded, unfortunately, it’s necessary to look at the facts.”  In other words, goodbye old comrade.

If Putin can confront reality, what will it take for  Assad to understand this is his last opportunity to leave in one piece with his family and find refuge in a  nice dacha outside of Moscow. I have a hunch he will not lack for money.

Putin Ponders Future Again

The one certainty in life is that when Russian President Vladmir Putin speaks, he will offer wise words about what he intends to do  and will make certain that he will never do it. In his state of the nation address once again there were promises to end corruption in the land, provide jobs for all, make certain kids could play in peace, build housing, and create a technology based economy. Of course, he made the same speech five years ago and ten years ago. However, Putin did add a new word to the Russian language when he promised to “de-offshoreise the economy.”

The Great Leader also wants the world to know they no longer will be allowed to  fund human rights groups in HIS land. How can he allow FOREIGNERS to undermine his work in ending human rights. So, keep your money, and stay out of HIS land!

Just remember if you are in the media, simply keep a copy of this speech and use it next year.

Cold War Foes Hot About Chemicals

Russia has been a firm friend to President Bashar al-Assad even as the civil with in Syria goes on and on and on. However, new reports that Assad might employ chemical  weapons have even frightened the Russian government. US Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta warned; “as the opposition advances, in  particular in Damascus that regime might very well consider use of chemical weapons.”

US Secretary of State Clinton has met with Russian Foreign Minister, Sergey Lavrov in an attempt to obtain a joint alliance to prevent introduction of chemical weapons into the fighting. They discussed ways in which their nations could prevent this disaster from occurring. Perhaps, the time is rapidly approaching when Russia offers Assad a nice dacha near Moscow and plenty of spending money if he only would get the hell out of Syria.

Let’s face it, President Assad, the writing is already on the wall.

Putin No Pussy When It Comes To Corruption

Vladimir Putin is the proverbial man on horseback who rides to the rescue to save his fellow countrymen from sins such as free elections of freedom of speech. Challenge his authority and one can readily find himself a nice cell in some distant prison in Siberia. President Putin has to explain his nation’s slow economic growth and he has discovered answers in corrupt officials who rob he nation blind. He now terms them “thieves, traitors and enemies of the people.” Of course, yesterday they were leaders of reform.

State run television now shows scenes of wild parties, drunken orgies and men and women who rob the country blind. Of course, most of these people were appointed by Putin and do his bidding. But, he has now discovered that the same people who were selected by the wise leader are now crooks.

TV Moderator, Arkady Mamintov depicted these folks as “forces in gray jackets who can sabotage reforms and are boycotting laws.” But, Arkady, shouldn’t you be aiming at the guy who appointed the thieves??

You Are Kidding, Aren’t You?

A new report reveals that American military leaders were planning to show the Soviet Union they were competing with a bunch of mad men and you certainly do not wish to risk the fate of your nation to a bunch of loonies in the US. Project A119,  A Study of Lunar Research Flight Project was designed to hurl an atomic bomb 238,000 miles into space so it could hit the moon and then deliver a boom that might even destroy the moon!! They hoped the flash of a moon  being destroyed would scare the hell out of Russians and make them think twice about messing with the Americans.

This nutty idea arose shortly after the first Russian  space  ship, Sputnik went into the sky. According to physicist Leonard Reiffei, American military leaders were serious. As of now, we do not know what President Eisenhower thought about this wild idea that made no sense.

Imagine if Mitt had become president! Wow, end all taxes for those who have millions??