Giuliani/Gingrich for Prez?

What is the meaning of a “Fitness Express?” Actually, I’d rather not know.

How do pebbles get in your shoe? And, why must I walk for two blocks before deciding to halt and get rid of the darn thing?

I firmly believe the 11th Commandment says that I must first put my socks on both feet before placing a shoe on a foot. And, I must always put on the left sock before the right sock.

Why is it we can send things into space with brilliant accuracy but can not figure out a health plan that will take care of all people in this nation?

I think Dick Cheney lives vicariously through the heroism of young people in service. It is as though he believes if some insurgents are killed, somehow he is the architect of their deaths.

I have never figured out how a pilot can drop a bomb and know for certainty he “killed x number of terrorists.” I guess they have Superman X-Ray vision in those planes.

I wonder who would be a candidate for president of the United States if no one were allowed to raise money and all candidates had equal time on TV?

The 2007 version of the New York Yankees proves conclusively that talent always wins over money. And, by the way, Joe Torre is the most over-rated manager in baseball.

Most barbers have short first names like Joe or Ray or Paul, but never Mike. I wonder why? Have you ever met a barber named Mike?

I expect Sarkozy, the new president of France, to appear any day dressed in a cowboy outfit like his hero John Wayne.

The French government is preparing a plan to pay immigrants to go home. I’d like to grab some of that money, but I don’t know where home is. My mother was born in the Polish part of the Austro-Hungarian Empire and my father was born in the Ukraine in Russia, which is now an independent nation. So, Sarky boy, where am I being sent back to?

Just imagine a Giuliani/Gingrich ticket – how will you fit all the names of their wives on it? I guess they will run on a program to foster family values. Many families and many values, that is.