The Canadian government has decided to toughen requirements in language proficiency in order to protect its nation against hordes of grammar deficient individuals who might enter their land and pollute the language-ways with improper speech. For example, identify the grammatical or syntactic error in the following sentence:
“The standard of living has increased.”
Stumped? If you can’t figure it out kiss your chances of getting into Canada goodbye. The answer is: “The standard of living has risen.” The grammar questions are among the trickiest in the International English Language Testing exam which consists of 30 minutes of listening, 15 of speaking and an hour each of reading and writing. Immigrants can take the test or submit documents they have lived in an English speaking country for ten years or have graduated from a college in such a nation.
OK, test givers, how about passing the following Impudent Observor immigration test:
Explain the meaning of the following sentence: “The eagle shits on Friday.” or try this one: Explain the meaning of “Kilroy was here.”
For those who are unfamiliar with the English language, “the eagle shits on Friday” refers to the early twentieth century when people got paid in cash for their work on Friday. “Kilroy was here” was a famous expression of American troops during WWII. Sorry, you Canadian test givers, we don’t want you in America since we have high standards of literacy.