Tag Archives: Sarah Palin

Bad News For Men In Ingushetia

There is bad news from Ingushetia where a council of Muslim scholars has decided to up the ante on securing the hand of a fair maiden. Men will now be required to pay a minimum of $1200 for the hand of a bride instead of the past $400 figure. It is the custom for men to pay a fee in order to ask a father to give consent for the marriage of his daughter. Of course, it is estimated at least half the brides in this North Caucusus region are abducted by men who want to marry them. Magomed Mutsolgov, a human rights activist argues abductions violate the Koran and “does not honor women.” Oh, the scholars also upped the price to settle a blood feud to $32,000.

My concern is what happens if I abduct Sarah Palin and seek to make her my bride. I would gladly pay $1,200 to get my hands on this fair maiden who is into millions since people actually believe her comments make sense. I assume once she is abducted any money she makes must belong to me. Heck, I will give her hubby the $32,000 and take off with this money making machine. Of course, the flip side is having to listen to her drivel and putting up with the winks and blinks. But, when all is said and done, money talks and makes more sense than anything the idiot woman can say.

Sarah Palin Defense Fund

Former Governor Sarah Palin established a defense fund while still governor in order to deal with complaints concerning her actions, but, by posting the word,”official,” it implied the fund was recognized by her in her role as governor. OK, it pulled in $400,000 which is about what Sarah pulls in for a weekend talk before her admirers. Frankly, Sarah Palin is among the greatest examples of someone who enters politics, winks and blinks in order to get across she is “one of the people” and then proceeds to cash in on the gullibility of those who believe Sarah actually has a idea in her head. The tragedy of Sarah Palin and her defense fund is tricking her followers into believing the forces of evil were out to get the fair maiden. From day one, Sarah had one thought in her mind– how to make money!

It is too bad Sarah never got together with the former governor of Illinois. Between the two of them, hustling dough was the ONLY order of business.

Secure Our Border Or Secure Palin’s Mouth

The mouth that roars nonsense once again uttered words of wrath against President Obama. Sarah Palin is concerned about illegal immigrants and wonders why, after an entire year as president, this man from Africa has failed to secure our border with Mexico. Standing with Arizona Governor Brewer, she told America, “it’s time for Americans across this country to stand up and say, ‘we’re all Arizonians now’ in clear unity. Mr President, do your job and secure our border.” Of course, during the eight years of the George Bush administration when an estimated five million illegal immigrants entered this country, not a single Republican congressman or governor blasted Bush for failing to “secure our border.’ In the bizzaro Palin world, every problem in America is due to Barack Obama!

George Bush began building a fence that has not worked too well. He did increase the number of those in the border patrol, that did not work too well. So, exactly what does the Putz from Alaska suggest President Obama do in order to handle illegal immigrants? I know, give a speech!

Just An Ordinary Gal Is Sarah, At $100,000 A Shot!

Hardly a speech goes by without Sarah Plain shrilly denouncing the “elitist liberals from the Ivy League” in contrast to her wholesome small town personna. She portrays herself as a gal you would love to have a cup of coffee with in a diner and, unlike, those liberal elitists, she is just one of us. Students at a California university went scrounging through the garbage and uncovered a contract the “gal just like you” negotiated for a speech. According to the document, she made clear any plane MUST BE a Lear60 or larger jet. She must be given at least three rooms at a luxury hotel, and Sarah, the ordinary gal from down the block even stipulated that her water bottles must be accompanied by three bendable straws!

The fascinating aspect of the contract deals with questions from the audience. Like all leaders of the “people” Sarah insists “questions are to be collected from the audience in advance, pre-screened and a designated representative…. shall ask questions directing at the speaker.” Isn’t it wonderful that this woman –who is just like you– only responds to questions she knows will be asked?

Gee, imagine if such a contract were found for Barack Obama! I can just hear Rush and Glenn and Bill going on a rant about elitist Ivy Leaguers who are afraid of the ordinary people!

Demagogue In A Skirt?

The history of America is replete with examples of political leaders who exploited hatred and anger in order to gain votes. During the 1950s, Senator Joseph McCarthy shouted, “communist” at anyone who challenged his interpretation of history. During the 1930s, Father Coughlin ranted against “Jewish bankers” as the cause of the Depression while Senator Huey Long promised everyone money and food if he received their vote. Today, Sarah Palin blinks her eyes and displays a smile while accusing anyone who opposes her views of being a SOCIALIST although it is doubtful if she has the slightest concept as to the meaning of the word. Some might argue no one ever went broke betting on the gullibility of the American people.

One might argue Sarah is a fool in sheep’s clothing who wants to create a modern version of the 18th century. She has absolutely no knowledge of how from day one of this nation, we had a national bank–Bank of the United States, the federal government built roads and canals and liberally interpreted the Constitution on such matters as the purchase of the Louisiana Territory. She is probably the first demagogue in a skirt in American history.

The demagogue is like a candle which shines bright for a few moments or hours, but eventually the flames flicker out and the candle disappears on the dustbin of history.

Sweden Bans Fake Boobs-Republicans Furious!

A new law which bans fake boobs in Sweden has sent a shudder of fear through members of the American Republican Party. What if this idea hops across the Atlantic and becomes law in the United States of America? What if it is now illegal to be a boob? What happens if FOX News must present newscasters who actually know the geographic position of Iraq and Afghanistan? What happens if the cute blond newscaster who reads words which roll by as she is on TV has to use her own words? Could anyone imagine the shock to the Rush Limbaugh program if in order to discuss Constitutional issues one had to actually READ THE CONSTITUTION?

Oh, I just had something handed to me which says the Swedish law does not refer to the boobs who inhabit the Republican Party but the boobs on a human body. Gee, I wonder if Sarah has real boobs, she certainly does not have any real understanding of American history. Just remember a boob in hand is worth ten boobs on Fox News.

Sarah Palin Available For Sex Talks?

When Republicans are not blasting away at President Obama for destroying basic American values they apparently are blasting away in Hollywood sex clubs. The party of the “right” is rapidly becoming famous for being the party of sex and Hollywood and all those terrible liberal things that Democrats have brought to America. The Republican National Committee admitted that a group of Young Republicans used their money to attend a bit of sex at a Hollywood sex club. We assume they were attempting to get girls of the night to see the right way by joining the great crusade to get rid of President Obama.

It now appears the Republican National Committee sent out a fund raising letter which listed the phone number of a “live one-on-one talk with a nasty girl.” Reports circulating from Washington indicate Sarah Palin has volunteered her services to handle all “live one-on-one talks with those seeking to converse with a nasty girl.” We believe Sarah is much better qualified for this role than for the role of a vice president.

Palin Wants Money-And Lots Of It!

Former governor, former vice president candidate, former beauty queen, former icon of poor and oppressed Americans, Sarah Palin, intends to stand up for those without by ensuring that she winds up with lots of it, money that is. Ms. Palin is pitching a reality TV show, tentatively entitled, “her Alaska,” in which the world will learn about the struggles of moose and deer and polar bears who are simply trying to prove they can make it even though they inhabit the upper climes of the United States of America. Ms. Palin will not take a million less than what she is worth since how many Republicans can pose-fully or not clad– as the champions of those without? After all, if you are without, doesn’t it make sense to get with it and make lots of money– just like those liberal pansies do in Hollywood?

God bless Ms. Palin, and I am certain God up above or down below or wherever He spends his time worrying about Sarah Palin. that this woman will wind up wealthy–the wise part is just not in her future.

Sarah Palin Will Inspire America!

OK, so this guy, Barack Obama, wrote a book about his life and Theodore Roosevelt wrote a few about the history of the United States, but the American people can now finally learn what was important in their own history from an eminent authority on society, morals, and the American way of life–Sarah Palin. She will include selections from books that inspired her and helped shape a mind that knows as much about American or world history as someone in a coma. We assume among the books that helped shape her mind were:

Goldilocks –don’t break and enter

Little Red Riding Hood –beware of dark skinned strangers

Alice In Wonderland — a powerful insight into life in Alaska governed by Sarah

The Wizard of OZ– Behind every Washington D.C. politician is a wizard who manipulates.

Gettysburg Address –written by Glen Beck. Isn’t that right?

Conscience of a Conservative –if Sarah quotes from Goldwater’s book, the ground will shake as he turns over in his grave.

The Constitution –of Russia, that is.

The Frog Prince –always keep a promise unless not keeping one gets you a lobbyist

Pinnochio –it explains why Republicans have such long noses

Sarah Palin Defends Down Syndrome Children

Former Governor Sarah Palin is on the attack because of a joke in the TV cartoon show which involved a child with Down Syndrome. She claims the joke went too far, particularly by linking her family to the cartoon character on the show. In the episode the character Chris falls for a girl with Down syndrome and when he asks about her family, she replies: “my dad’s an accountant and my mom is the former governor of Alaska.” Ms. Palin’s youngest child has Down syndrome. After reading the remarks made on the show this writer is confused about what exactly is being stated that is negative regarding Down syndrome. In fact, the character is displays respect by falling in love with a girl having Down syndrome.

The real issue is how angry Sarah Palin becomes when issues of children with disabilities is raised. Strangely, she has no anger when millions of children are living in poverty, she has no anger when millions of children lack medical care or access to decent school. Is there something weird about Palin’s anger regarding abuse of children?