Christmas Presents For All

In lieu of spending money this year, we offer Xmas presents for a select few.

John Boehner hopefully will receive a new assortment of nuts for the new Congress.

For Mr. LaPierre, we send a trip to the Congo where he can use his guns against militants in the jungle.

For Mitt Romney, we send a year supply of humanity.

For Barack Obama we send the latest version of a spine.

For UK PM David Cameron, we send a copy of Paul Krugman articles during 2012.

For Vladimir Putin, we send a full size copy of his ego, in technicolor, that is.

For Republican Party members in the House of Representatives we send a trip to Disneyland so they can feel at home.

For Don Rumsfeld and Dick Cheney we offer a free trip to Afghanistan and Iraq in order that they can survey their handiwork a few years later.

For George Bush, we offer a piece of the forest for cutting trees.

For Sarah Palin, we offer a free hunting trip in Afghanistan where she can display her prowess with the gun.

For Michelle Bachmann we offer a free operation to finally provide her with a working brain.

For Rick Santorum, we offer an accident that leaves him disabled and paying the full cost for medical care.

For Justice Scalia we send a copy of the Original Constitution which says that corporations are people and that is why they fought the American Revolution.