COMMENTS YOU NEVER WILL HEAR

Following are comments that were thought but never expressed.

Sarah Palin: You mean ‘socialism’ isn’t when people get together and socialize with sex?

John McCain: If this keeps up I’ll come to represent the radical wing of the Republican party.

Governor Pawtley: My state is supposed to have two senators until Norm Coleman concluded being an incumbent meant you were not supposed to lose.

Al Franken: And the Republicans complained I was the comedian!

Obama: I wonder what would happen if I converted to Judaism and wore a yarmulka? Rush would probably rant about me now being a Semite like them other Arabs.

Larry Summers: I am boorish, but a brilliant bore is hard to find.

College Grad in 2009: I should have taken dad’s advice and joined the plumber’s union.

Kobe Bryant: I am the GREATEST, got it LeBron!!

Jon Stewart: How could I fill a half hour without help from the idiots at Fox News and Rush and Karl Rove!

Ron Paul: Did I get something wrong about trusting free enterprise businessmen?

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  • http://www.mnprogressiveproject.com The Big E

    Actually, Jon Stewart does occasionally admit how helpful Fox, Rush and Karl et al are.

    That and Al Franken has occasionally admitted that sometimes the Republicans can be way funnier (unintentionally) … which is of course pretty funny in itself … especially the way he phrases it.

    Nonetheless, thanks for the laughs.