Do Atheists Go To Heaven?

As eminent theologians such as Sarah Palin, Rush Limbaugh, and the dean of nuts, Michele Bachmann have informed the world, atheists are evil people who will never get into heaven–like we good folk of the Book! Atheists, agnostics, humanists and anyone else not part o the Tea Party have formed a group at the Fort Bragg army base. They are asking for recognition as a legitimate group by the United States armed forces. Lt. Samantha Nicoll pointed out: Their name is: MASH–Military, Atheists, and Secular Humanists. “People look at you differently if you say that you are an atheist.” There have been attempts by other similar groups to get the Army gazing in their direction in order to attain confirmation as a legitimate group in the armed forces.

I assume these people are coming out of the atheist closet and want acceptance as being alive. On the other hand, if we Americans are this “special nation” that Republicans so often exclaim, then as God’s chosen people we should expect all to accept OUR God. Of course, this assumes there is a GOD somewhere up in the sky. Frankly, based on my communications with GOD, he left this area thousands of years ago after watching humans engage in non-stop murder.

Please don’t get me wrong, some of my best friends are humans. Not, that I would marry any of them.