It is now clear that the National Rifle Association has gotten under the control of those who do not recognize my second Amendment rights. We Americans need a New Gun policy that finally allows those of us seeking to provide meaningful experiences for our wonderful guns to demand new gun laws. This is what a New Gun Policy would look like:
1. If any person looks at me with the wrong look, I have the right to challenge this person for a shoot out at high noon.
2. Each American child at birth should be given a loaded gun in their crib. If mom or dad does not respond quick enough to cries, the baby has a right to blast away!
3. Each American student in pre-school through 12th grade is entitled to “A” grades. No A, no life is the right of students. In fairness, a student should have the right to challenge a teacher about grades with a shoot out at 3:00 p.m.
4. American males are entitled to groping rights if a woman is pretty. If a woman will not allow a grope, then we males have a right to grope for our gun and wave it in her face.
5. Each week time should be set aside in Congress for a shoot out instead of all this talking about shooting. I would love to see John Boehner and Ted Cruz standing up straight with guns in their hands as they confront Democratic leaders. Heck, Mitch McConnell can wave a gun, now let’s see if he can fire one–when confronted by a congressman holding a gun!
After members of Congress have killed themselves off, we might be able to elect some folks who never want to see a gun in the hands of anyone!