Get With God Or Hit The Road To Hell!

Workers at Russkoye Moloko, which means Russian Milk, have received an ultimatum for their employer concerning their private conduct. After consulting with God above, Boiko Veliky(Boiko the Great) has concluded he can not allow anyone in his employ to have an abortion, get drunk and or have sex without either getting married or receiving his permission. If you dare to live with someone without benefit of the clergy, then it is best to head for the nearest train and get the hell out of town. Boiko told the media: “we have about 6,000 employees, most of whom are Orthodox, and I expect them to be faithful and to repent.” He made clear to a woman who had an abortion that she was no longer welcome in his house of worship where the goal is milking cows and not breasts unless you are married and have a baby. His ultimatum to repent and find God came as Russia struggled with a terrible drought and huge forest fires. Naturally, Boiko had an explanation for this problem, “such a an extreme situation is punishment for the Russian people’s sins.” Once he gets the milk situation under control, watch out for those producing alcohol.

I am glad someone finally has discovered the source of fires in Russia. Mess with the Man Upstairs and God knows what will happen downstairs.