Gunman Not Chicken

There is scant doubt the chicken wars will not depart from our shores within the coming months. Millions of people are determined to  eat chicken, eat chicken and halt the spread of homosexual behavior. Experts report there is conclusive evidence that people who eat chicken every day are not prone to become  gay or lesbian. Of course, there are those who believe to eat chicken is  the first step on the road to hatred and bigotry against those who prefer a gay life.

A gentleman who was upset at Chicken-Fil-A decided it was time to put the rooster to sleep. He entered the Family Research Council headquarters and shouted his anger at their support of chicken rights. The gentleman shot a security guard who was in charge of protecting the chicken supply for those working at the Research Council. We are pleased to report the chickens are safe, only on man was wounded, and if you are gay, shed a tear for the chickens.