Each day we offer a sample of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

UK, Independent:  “Cameron Calls For Can Do Optimism”

Jobless should feel confident they will continue to be jobless.

NY Daily News:   “Now Is Not My Time”

Neither is tomorrow.

New Zealand, New Zealand Herald:  “How Mafia Can Damage Your Health”

Permanently, I assume.

Sweden, Local:  “King Gives Saudi King Award”

Best lasher king on the planet.

Norway, Norway Post:  “Masturbation File”

If it is the verbal masturbation file, then Glenn Beck is sole possessor.

Turkey, Hurriyet:  “Elephant In Room”

When Chris Christie enters, most elephants leave due to lack of room.

Denmark, Copenhagen Post:  “City Needs Potion Of Distortion”

Check with Fox News, it has plenty of distortion soup.