Headlines From The World’s Press

Each week we offer a review of headlines that appeared in the world’s press with our accompanying comments.

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “Wozniacki Face Wozniak”
I believe the better “eye” will win.

Australia, West Australian: “Stocks Close Higher”
“Stocks Sharply Lower”
Do I go up or down to check my rising-lowering stock prices?

Saudi Arabia, Saudi Gazette: “Baby Born On Train Get Free Life Time Pass”
So, what do I get if I die on a train?

Norway, Aftenposten: “No Room At The Inn”
Sorry, Mr. Jesus we are all filled up, but how about the barn across the street?

Qatar, Arab News: “Brown’s Chutzpah Pays Off”
I think its chutzpah for an Arab paper to print the word chutzpah.

Japan, Japan Times: “What To Expect From North Korea”
North Koreans?

Sweden, The Local: “Public Urination Leads To Fines”
What about if I urinate in my pants in public?

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “Christian Democrats Drop God From Platform”
Is there new name, the “Atheist Democratic Party?”

Australia, Sydney Morning Post: “Small town Left Reeling From Fake Policeman”
Big deal, he was only handling fake crimes.

Oman, Arab Times: “Flying Carpets Smuggle In Heroin”
I believe when Aladdin gets high he can take off in a minute.

Sweden, The Local: Woman Dies In Collision With Deer”
And, no concern for what happened to the deer?

Switzerland, Basel Zeitung: “Basel Has Too Many Restaurants”
I believe the issue is quality over quantity.

Bhutan, Bhutan Times: “Harnessing The Tibetan Sun”
We want to make certain it doesn’t appear over China.

Australia, West Australian: “Leave It As You Found It”
Gee, I wish George Bush could have followed that advice.

China, China Daily: “Reveal Five Year Corruption Plan”
How do I get in on the corruption plan?

Kuwait, Kuwait Times: “Man Auctions His Life”
For you, I have a special deal, would you believe $9.99?