Each day we offer a sample of headlines that appeared in the world press along with our comments.

Australia, Sydney Morning Herald: “Two Dead In Yacht Race”
I assume it was a dead tie.

Sweden, The Local: “Masturbating Driver Accused Reckless Driving”
It depends on what you term the “driving” he was doing.

Norway, Norway Post: “Politicians Take Stand Against Sun Beds”
I am thrilled politicians take such strong stands on such critical issues.

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “Politicians Take Stand Against Sun Beds”
Not one nickel for sun beds if they are connected to national health insurance.

Canada, Toronto Star: “NASA Rockets Crash Into Moon”
I wonder how we would feel if Xulians crashed rockets into Earth?

UK, The Independent: “Bosses Want Black Lesbians”
Does this mean, No White Lesbians Need Apply?

Australia, Brisbane Times: “Fevola Traded For Lions”
They received ten Christians in return.

South Africa, Argus: “Ordered to Kill Deceased”
That is why dead men tell not tales.