Headlines Of The Week

Each Sunday we offer some headlines that appeared in the world press along with our satirical comments.

Belgum, Belgium Expactica: “International Day For Homophobia”
I think they mean “against.”

Netherlands, Dutch News: “Hospitals Ask Patients For Donations”
You patients out there, have any bandages, medicine, gauze, needles, etc..

Australia, Sydney Morning Herald: “Tourist Strips To Defy Wolf Whistles”
I believe this is termed baiting the trap.

Bhutan, Bhutan Times: “Kremlin Critic Gets Genital Reminder Who’s In Charge”
Putin wants to make certain he stands upright for being the head boss.

Finland, Sanomat: “Smashes Wheelchair Racing 100m And Sets World Record”
He wll now be entering the high jump contest.

England, Manchester Guardian: “Donkey Jailed for Wild Behavior”
Oh, have they finally caught up with Bush for his presidency?

Denmark, Copenhagen Post: “Japan Imports Elder Care”
They will be exporting dead bodies.

New Zealand, Herald: “New Zealand Pilot Lands On Wing And A Prayer”
The plane will shortly follow.

Bhutan, Bhutan Times: “Potato And Onion Counter Inflation”
We need some food for thought to get rid of inflation.

Australia, Brisbane Times: “Reptile Expert Fined For Reptile Scam”
Mr. Rattle and his associate Ms. Rabbit were fined by Judge Boa for
acting like snakes in the grass.

Australia, Brisbane Times: “Japan’s Buter Spread Too Thin”
Oh, Leo, please watch the margine when you spread the butter.

Sweden, The Local: “Kinky Swedish Mums Want More Sex”
This story really gets me tied up in a chain reaction.

Norway, Aftenposten: “Climate Change Threatens Moose”
I think we are moosing around too much with the atmosphere.

Sweden, The Local: “Cheese Thief Caught”
The Swiss man was goudaad into confessing.

Switzerland, Basel Zeitung: “Basel Has Too Many Restaurants”
I don’t think it’s the quantity of retaurants that counts so much as the quality.

Saudi Arabia, Saudi Gazette: “Chairs With Talking Points”
Gentlemen, I move that we table this point.

I hope you enjoyed the week in review.