Each week we offer a review of headlines that appeared in the world’s press.
Australia, Brisbane Times: “Moon Goes Horribly Wrong”
You idiot, I told you the evening, the evening.
Kuwait, Kuwait Times: “Seeking Moustaches In India”
They are combing the mountains in search of them.
Sweden, The Local: “Swedish Navy To Hunt Pirates”
The Vikings are coming, the Vikings are coming…
Australia, Sydney Morning Post: “Drunk Mother Lets Toddler Drive”
That’s akin to allowing George Bush to drive America.
Australia, Sydney Morning Post: “Too Fat To Fly”
Is that the pilots or the passengers?
Canada, Toronto Star: “Swedish Santa Gets Summer Job”
I think we’re going to have one real hot time this winter.
Australia, The Age: “Too Many Germans In Hotel”
Ich bin ein teetootler.
Hungary, Budapest Sun: “PM An Idiot Moron”
“I’ll gladly exchange your moron for our American one.
Sweden, The Local: “Elvis No Name For Girl”
Or, neither for a boy.
Norway, Aftenposten: “Official Urges Beggar Boycott”
Notice, no mention of a lobbyist boycott.
Qatar, Arab Times: “Bad News For Cairo Art Students”
No nudes is not always bad news.
Bhutan, Bhutan Times: “Dentist Fatal Leap”
He leaped into the mouth of danger.
Gibraltar, Gibraltar Chronicle: “Four Years For Local Robber”
Six, if he robbed a foreigner.
Guyana, Starbroek: “Cop Shot Self In Foot”
He wanted to slow down the race for justice.
Sweden, The Local: “Giant Pinocchio Unveiled”
It was officially designated as the George Bush Swedish statue.
Australia, Brisbane Times: “Reptile Expert Fined Over Reptile Scam”
Mr. John Cobra was ordered to pay four rats, two rabbits, and a mongoose.
Norway, Aftenposten: “Climate Change Impacts Moose”
I think they should moosey along down south.