Hey, That’s My Hard On, Not Yours!

Someone in Yemen decided to blow up a cargo plane and sent a package that was really a bomb. Naturally, this means that every passenger going through the terminal is a potential bomber and close attention must be paid to their behavior and actions. A new policy is being instituted by the Transportation Security Administration(TSA) which seeks to get to the heart of the matter if the scanner reveals you have some sort of unusual bulge on your body. The new pat-down procedure allows an airport employee to do a sliding motion down your body, including touching breasts or genitals in order to determine if that strange bulge which appeared on the screen is your actual body or the bomb being carried on the plane. I assume this means no man should get a hard-on prior to boarding a plane, they are OK once on the plane. As for you women with large breasts, how about a breast reduction program to avoid being groped in the airport? Naturally, the TSA insists a pat-down “makes good security sense.”

If we finally are going to get serious about airport security isn’t it time we learned from the Nazis? How about a complete strip search in which every passenger strips to the naked body? In this way, we can be certain about if they possess a bomb. Of course, this also means checking the butt in case the bomber has one stored in his ass. Of course, to help finance this program, why not a reality show called: “Best Hand Action In Dong The Pat Down?”