Hosni Hesitates To Hop Out Of Egypt

There are unconfirmed reports that President Hosni Mubarak has either decided or not decided to get the hell out of the country. He was heartened by the sight of men on horseback and camels dashing through the streets of Cairo in a gallant effort to defend him by shitting all over the streets in order to compel demonstraters to get the hell back home. Meanwhile in Washington D.C. there were hurried conferences by members of the Pentagon and Justice Department who are concerned if Mubarak departs, where can the United States send prisoners to be tortured? After all, Egyptian interrogators know how to interrogate and we certainly do not wish to lose their talents in the war against terrorism. One concern of President Mubarak is the composition of the crowds. There are reports of seeing Osama bin Laden amidst the throngs shouting and throwing stones. If Hosni leaves, will it result in al-Qaeda seizing power in his country?

President Barack Obama(no relative of Mubarak or Osama bin Laden) is working furiously to clear up any confusion at Fox News about similarities of names. He awaits some lines and diagrams from Glenn Beck which will connect the Mubarak family to the Osama bin Laden family and wind up in Washington D.C. with the Obama family.

Anyway, pay no attention to this blog if you want honest information about those in the streets of Cairo.