How To Create New Jobs

Republican presidential candidates constantly complain at inaction in creating jobs. We believe they are right. So, here are some suggestions on how to create jobs in America:

1. Each presidential candidate-and President Obama– should hire unemployed people to stand around in a crowd at their fund raisers.

2.  Each presidential candidate and the Tea Party should allow unemployed people to gather up their hot air and sell it as an energy source.

3. Unemployed people could be hired to grow tea and thus enable Tea Party folk to have the brew of their choice.

4. Unemployed people could be hired as guides who warn off bears when Sarah Palin is out hunting.

5. Those with wealth could hire unemployed people to carry money from their business establishment to their local bank.

6. Gee, there are plenty of jobs available on yachts of the wealthy, sweeping the deck, cooking in the galley, etc…

7. John Huntsman is trailing in polls. He has a few million to spare. Why not hire unemployed folk to become the crowd he just is not able to secure?

8. John Boehner cries nonstop so why not hire people to collect his tears and donate them at homeless shelters for those in need of a good hot shower?

9. Michele Bachmann is desperately in need of a few thousand fact checkers whenever she speaks.

10. Tea Party folk seek to resurrect our Revolutionary attitude of dumping tea in harbors. Why not encourage unemployed people to dump Wall Street bankers in the Hudson River?