Jade Rabbit Dead!!

Jade Rabbit died in a slow and painful manner as it attempted to wander across the surface of the Moon. Suddenly, for some strange and mysterious reason the lunar rover that China sent into space back in December, 2012 came to a halt. Officials stated it had something to do with “mechanical control abnormalities” but this intrepid reporter knows the real reason for the death of our beloved Jade Rabbit. Its death was ordered by President Obama who did not wish China to receive credit for sending a rocket into the air that did not fall to Earth in Herald Square. So, Obama had a Drone follow the Chinese rocket into space and when the world was not looking, it blasted away and damaged Jade Rabbit.

Anyway, Republican members of Congress have no one to cross exam this week so they now have a reason to pursue, not only Barack Obama, but Hillary Clinton in order to clear up the mystery as to why Jade Rabbit suddenly, and mysteriously, came to a halt. In the world of Fox News and the Republican Party, there are no accidents, anything and everything is part of a plot against American job creators.