NOBODY ASKED ME BUT

We offer observations on the human condition from a twenty year old mind trapped in an eighty year old body.

Nobody Asked Me But,

I can never figure out why a woman wears four rings. Four marriages?

I have an unusual ability to live comfortably in ambiguity.

Americans have a propensity to find A reason for all complex problems.

American college students majoring in history blame all Earth ills on “Western hegemony” whatever that means.

Why didn’t Tea Party folk complain about rising debt when George Bush was president?

I prefer frumpy old First Ladies so I am spared stories about how she dressed last night.

My greatest concern in life is whether they have Direct TV in Heaven so I can watch NY Yankee games.

I have never seen two people talking when both had full mouths. Have you?

Some days my greatest confusion is which numbers to select so I can lose in the lottery.

Great changes in life commence with small steps.

Every revolution begins with a Great Bang and concludes in a whimper.

A man sat down next to me and cleaned the table with a newspaper. I am certain the germs welcomed his actions.

The only certainty in my life is uncertainty.

I once sat on a mountain top in Colorado and witnessed the grandeur of Nature. No human action can match that experience.

The next time you desire to change the world, just give a loved one a big hug.

I was a hippie during the sixties in my heart more than in my actions.

I am 80 going on 20.

The smell of popcorn tastes better before rather than during eating.

I have a right to a new breakfast biscuit if it crumbles.

No place for greater silence than a Hardees in rural Missouri at 7:30 a.m.

Wearing high black boots not only makes a woman taller, but more dominant.

There are people who pray to God and there are people who do God’s work.

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