Nobody Asked Me But,

Nobody Asked Me But,

I am not a mall person. I prefer small shops whose owners I know. I enjoy talking with them and when I leave there is comfort in knowing if anything goes wrong, it can be returned.

The army taught me how complex was the action of having 200 men make a right turn. The presence of 150,000 soldiers and 160,000 contractors will not quickly be removed from Iraq.

I saw an ad which described how dad taught children about playing ball. Was I asleep when they passed a law saying mom couldn’t help children to play ball.

For the first time, every parking space at my bagel shop was taken. Once you get Christians eating bagels and cream cheese, there is no end to the mischief they will do.

As dictator I will decree that no child can be allowed to enter a summer school. Summer time is for walking in forests or parks, of lounging around with friends, for just being lazy and enjoying life.

The good news for the Clinton family is he can return to the $100,000 a night speaking gigs.

The conversation I would enjoy is with Colin Powell listening to him discuss life with George.

I live in west county, St. Louis, hardly the center of ethnic diversity. My supermarket just created a Bosnian and Jewish section. Who besides me will buy matzos and Halavah?

Children only need respect, not money. A supermarket clerk gave a little boy a small package to carry. The boy beamed with pride.

Flowers are evidence there is some design in the universe. They bring joy and peace to humans.

I entered a store that claimed to be a 99 cents store. But, many items were $2. Is this misleading advertising.

It is difficult for me to hate anyone for more than 48 hours. The people who most arouse this emotion are those who denigrate the poor and powerless.

Eating a doughnut once a month makes the doughnut the food of Gods, eating in on a daily basis makes it junk food.

I can never understand why it takes so long to fix highways. In St. Louis they have closed Highway 40 for a year. In WWII, they built bridges in a day, constructed airports in a week, and built the Alaska highway in less than a year. Why not bring back the Seabees?

It must be a requirement to work at Best Buy for the person to be under the age of 30./

John McCain must be morally tortured at refusing to vote to end torture of prisoners. At night, does he recall his own torture experience?

They should have stoops in front of all buildings. Stoops are a developer of community relations.

I saw a heavy set man with full beard and immediately assumed he was a computer nerd. Does that reveal something about my bigotry?

I nice man called and told me he would take care of all my debts and I would not have to pay all of them. They have such nice men and women calling you these days. I wonder why they are so nice to me.

Veterans of World War II have a sense of accomplishment and pride. I fear those coming back from Iraq will melt into society unnoticed and unrewarded and unfulfilled.

I saw a sign that said: “Foot Specialist.” Is that the same as a podiatrist?

I have never seen a post office that has enough parking spaces for cars.

I don’t recall tee-shirts with writing when I was young. How did they come about?

It is against my sense of fatherhood to show my children’s pictures to others. Their pictures are for me, not you.

If I see two women engaged in a long conversation in the morning bagel shop, I assume it is about men.

Peace and Love

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