NOBODY ASKED ME BUT,

Each week, we present reflections on human society by a 78 year old man with the curious mind of a 12 year old.

Nobody Asked Me But.

I always feel completely secure on a bus because I have complete confidence in bus drivers.

I have never felt the need to gloat at an enemy’s misfortune. It is not who I am.

The other day someone crumpled a piece of paper and I burst out in laughter. In my youth, paper was crumbled on the radio to depict action.

There should be a law that prevents three trucks from being in three lanes at the same time.

I make it a policy to forget an umbrella on days when it rains.

My ongoing dilemma on rainy days is whether I open the umbrella while sitting in the car or when I step out into the rain.

A man walked by me with his cap turned around. He was making a statement but I have no idea what it is.

If Sarah Palin was Sam Palin, the media would crucify him.

I notice that many people rise in order to talk on their cell phone. Is the reception better when one is standing?

Every time I take a short cut to get home it become a long run.

People call Russia an “evil empire. It entered and exited Georgia in four months. If Russia is an “evil empire,” than what does one call Bush America after five years in Iraq?

I saw someone eating a muffin with a knife and fork. How about a mouth and big bite?

Should a parent follow or lead the child? I have always grappled with this dilemma.

Who invented the “baker’s dozen?” And, why? But, no one offers a “fruit stand dozen tomatoes.”

I often wonder if there is a difference between morning conversations in a bagel shop between employees and customers from those in the afternoon.

I have often dreamed of opening a Matzo and coffee shop. It would certainly be more healthful than bagel places.

I rarely hold a bag with two fingers as many people do. My entire hand grips the bag. I am a “fear bag dropper.”

I rarely see a woman carrying her purse with the left hand, but bags are carried in that hand.

I usually park so I can drive right out and avoid backing up.

Sometimes when I open my car door from the right side, the left side door does not open. On other occasions, it does. Does this indicate car doors have free will?

If on a Saturday morning you see a well dressed man and woman walking briskly along the street it is a high probability they are Orthodox Jews on their way to the synagogue.

Wearing of tongs after September 1 should be forbidden.

I am circulating a form to all of my neighbors. It asks them to list all examples when they have broken the law. I don’t want to be attacked by Palin-McCain for associating with criminals.

The price of gas is dropping. My dilemma is how do I store cheap gas so I will have some available when gas prices rise.

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