NOBODY ASKED ME BUT,

Each week we offer the biased and completely unscientific observations on the human condition as seen through the eyes of a78 year old boy.

Nobody Asked Me But,

I have never seen a crowd in Office Max. Have you?

I was in the Rest room when a man walked past the open urinal and went to pee in a stall. Is this an example of urinal discrimination?

A nice lady allowed three of us with a single purchase to cut ahead of us in the checkout lane. Yes, Santa, Christmas is still alive.

Sleet and Stopsky do not mix.

I used to enjoy Law and Order but the TV series has grown boring and one knows the outcome half way through the show. Mix things up and little and make the show interesting.

Some people buckle up before turning on the ignition key. I buckle while the car is moving. Which are you?

I awoke at 6:00 a.m. on the day after Christmas to see if crowds really would go to department stores. Yes, they did go!

I love figs. It is my desert genes from ancient times. But, I don’t like dates. Did someone in my ancestry have a bad date?

A dear friend of mine is in a wheel chair. There are times when we need laws to protect the rights of people who want to move around.

My hearing is getting worse. I increasingly watch subtitled films. To tell the truth, they contain less violence than what is found in American films.

I was raised in a New York City Jewish ghetto so I am still surprised to find bagel shops closed on Christmas.

‘If you live to be a hundred,” said the man to me, “you’ll be OK.” But, that is only 22 years away!

One rarely encounters a female car salesperson. Why?

A man and a woman were sitting in a giant SUV and ordered food to go from the car. They are the symbol of America–get off your butts and WALK inside to order!

I counted three Walgreens drug stores within one mile of one another. Now, a CXS pharmacy is opening. Do you ever get the feeling America consists of drug stores, banks, and churches?

I saw a sign that said: “Tanning and Travel.” Shouldn’t it say: “Travel and Tan?”

I think anyone named Dr. Kevin Foote should be a podiatrist, not a D.D. S.

It is impossible for a fast food place to offer, “homestyle chicken.” Do they raise chickens in the shed in the back?

I always have this smirk on my face and feeling of triumph when I correct a price for a salesperson and they check to find out I am right.

These days shoppers greet salespeople in order to get the bargains.

I am very quiet at football games. My emotion is inside, not outside.

A man entered the library carrying a soda. In my youth, he never would have been allowed to enter.

I hate people who speed up to hit a puddle at full blast in order to soak people on the sidewalk.

I realized the other day I have no idea how beer is made. Then again, I don’t drink beer.

I gather Sarah Palin is on a sled trip to Russia. Someone better tell her there is a Bering Strait that must be crossed.

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