Spies Come In From Cold With New Names

The ongoing saga of the ten Russian spies continues now that they have returned home to their beloved homeland. the Russian spies who changed their names from Boris and Svetlana to Bob and Susan must now undergo another transformation from their American names to ones which would fit into Russian society. After all, going around calling oneself, Juan or Maria. in the middle of Siberia will most probably reveal you are no Siberian. Of course, not only must they change names, but also occupations. Fortunately, modern Russia contains many McDonald’s and Kentucky Fried Chicken franchises which would allow Anna Chapman to switch from showing off her neat body at cocktail parties to showing off her English slang to visiting tourists from America or Europe who chance to seek a Big Mac.

I admit concern for the well being of these heroic Russian heroes, they will go down in the history of spy annals as the ones who brought back to their homeland stories of conversations at parties, recipes stolen from neighbors, and reportedly, the secret recipe for making the new Papa John Pizza! An unconfirmed report from our special correspondent in Moscow suggests Anna Chapman was able to worm her way into the good graces of a bus driver who handles a 2nd Avenue bus in Manhattan. This enabled her to obtain not only the bus schedule but the time log of bus drivers on 2nd Avenue. First, Second Avenue, then 42nd Street, and finally, Park Avenue!!

We can guarantee readers there is no validity to stories about Anna Chapman being seen with George Bush in a bar. This story stems from confusion and what she meant to say is that she was hiding behind a bush when the Bush car drove by.

  • http://mynipples.org Fernando

    We can guarantee readers there is no validity to stories about Anna Chapman being seen with George Bush in a bar. This story stems from confusion and what she meant to say is that she was hiding behind a bush when the Bush car drove by.

    LOL