Tea Party Summons Romanian Witches

There are reports leaders of the American Tea Party, along with key Republican leaders in Congress, have visited Romania where they had extensive discussions with witches. Romanian witches have declared war on taxes by the government, and these days one seeks allies in even the most unusual places. Senator Jim DeMint is reportedly learning how to use cat excrement and dead dogs to cast a spell on a certain leading Democrat who lives in the White House. Once those animals hit the waters of the Potomic it is time for Democrats to keep the lights on all night in their houses since evil spirits will be hovering in the darkness and God knows what they will do when becoming angry. We urge any Democrat to beware of a poisonous mandrake plant which has the power to transform President Obama into a decent God fearing white man who goes to church on Sunday and abandons his Muslim religion.

We warn President Obama and Vice President Joe Biden that if they wear any purple clothes on certain days of the week, their bodies will shrivel up and their hair will turn white. The best hope for Democrats is to repeal all tax laws, place witches in charge of our budget making and round up as many dead dog bodies as they can.

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