Tiki’s Running From Giant Nazis!

Tiki Barber was once an outstanding running back with the New York Football Giants. He holds most running records for the team and was at the peak of his career when Tiki decided he did not like the coach of the team and he did not believe the organization was showing him sufficient respect. Oh, that paid him millions, but where was the respect for his great running. So, Tiki left his cleats behind and went on TV where he immediately insulted former team mates, coach Tom Coughlin and the owner of the Giants. Tiki lasted several years in the NFL, but only about one in the TV league. So, Tiki decided to return to football and once again dash through holes and score touchdowns. Alas, jokes began to circulate concerning his old body and Tiki became upset. As he noted in a Sports Illustrated article, together with a new girl friend, he moved into the home of his agent, Mark Lepselter where they hid out in the attic.

“Lep’s Jewish and it was like a reverse Anne Frank thing.” Yes, Tiki, it was like a reverse Anne Frank thing. The football Nazis were on your tail. The TV pundit Nazis were out to get you. The New York Football Giant Nazis were laughing at your aged body and condemning it to the garbage heap. Tiki, I do not know how you get a good night’s sleep because of those Nazis who are out to get you.

Oh, Tiki, your wife who you left while pregnant with two children is sleeping peacefully these days.