Whatever Happened To Al-Assad?

During the past few months as stories about ISIS have filled the media, it is rare to come across anything about Syrian dictator Bashar al-Assad. He certainly does not get the media attention that was so common a few months ago. So, I talked with the man.

M: I notice that the media does not pay attention to you these days.

A: Absolutely correct. I am furious. I kill people, but all the media talks about is this ISIS!

M: I guess you feel upset at being ignored?

A: Ignored? When was the last time the New York Times put my photo on its front page?

M: Beats me.

A: I murder, I bomb, I kill, and all I get is a slight mention on page 24.

M: I think you are front page worthy!

A: Compare attention to my dear friend, Vladimir Putin and attention to me.

M: Your buddy certainly is number One for the media.

A: Remember the good old days when Vladimir got a few words and I dominated the media?

M: Ah, the good old days when you were Number One murderer.

A: Well, one day I will return to that position.

M: If I was in Syria, I would do everything in my power to get you back on the top spot.

A: what was your name again? Do that, I can get you a good deal on a new car.