Xmas Trees Survive Attack!

A Muslim student attending Oregon State University decided he wanted to strike a blow for Islam against the infidel Americans, but, alas, his attempt failed to detonate. Mohamed Osman Mohamud, age 19, was in contact with someone he thought was located in northwest Pakistan, but it turned out the man was located at FBI headquarters. Mohamed spent months planning an important strike against the forces of Christianity and zeroed in on Christmas trees. After all, first one wipes out Xmas trees, then one wipes out Santa Claus and one has transformed millions of American children into doubters in their religion. If there are no Xmas trees and no Santa, how can there really be a Jesus Christ. But, for that matter, how can there be a Mohmmed? Ms. Mohamud did not realize the “explosives laden van” was simply a van supplied to him by the FBI in order to demonstrate how ineffectual are most Muslims in America who attempt to do anything that involves using bombs.

We are pleased to report that no Xmas trees were damaged and the tree lighting ceremony went smoothly. However, we did notice in the crown a band of Tea Party folk who wanted to strike a blow against ‘the government.” Did their anger against “the government” include the FBI which is part of “the government?”